Wedding in Germany: features, traditions and interesting facts

Each country has its own traditions in holding wedding ceremonies, and Germany is no exception. The Germans sacredly honor and observe their customs, but every year statistics show us that the number of marriages is decreasing. On average, 400,000 marriages were recorded in the country per year, and fifty years ago statistics showed figures several times higher. As for age, the average for women is 31 years old, for men – 33. We can conclude that both brides and grooms are getting older. It remains to figure out how weddings take place in Germany.

Wedding preparations

Of course, a marriage proposal traditionally has to come from a man, but some modern women have taken this responsibility upon themselves and come up with a little traditional trick. A woman can propose to her man on February 29, and he has no right to refuse. Even if such an opportunity comes only once every four years, you can thoroughly prepare. But if the guy still turns out to be not ready for the wedding, he will have to pay off with a good gift.

Polterabend, or pre-holiday party

One of the most popular traditions is called Polterabend. This is a kind of party that is held at the bride's house. Many people compare the event with a bachelorette or bachelor party, but this is not entirely true. No guests are invited to Polterabend, since everyone who knows about this party and considers it necessary to come comes for no reason. The Germans call this day the rehearsal dinner, and the bride's parents prepare it in a buffet format. One of the features of the holiday is that any guest can contribute and bring some pastries, snacks or alcohol to the table. In general, the name Polterabend comes from the word poltern, which means “to make noise”, “to rumble”. This is where the main highlight of the holiday lies: guests must bring with them vases, dishes, pots and in general anything that can easily be broken in front of the windows of the house. According to legend, the sound of breaking dishes should disperse all evil and unfriendly spirits. But the bride and groom should not forget that it is their responsibility to remove the fragments in order to prove their unity, and the more fragments, the better. After all, dishes are broken for good luck, and such a tradition before a German wedding in Germany really lifts your spirits.

How much does a wedding in Germany cost?

Despite their practicality and economy, the Germans spend quite a large budget on the most important events in life, including weddings. Therefore, be prepared that for this celebration you will need a little more money than in your homeland. For example, renting a castle for the whole day can cost several tens of thousands of euros. It will be cheaper to book it only during the official ceremony.

In general, all costs will range from 6-12 thousand euros. The price includes (price in euros):

dress for the bride – 800-1500;
makeup and hairstyle – 200-400;
hall rental – 300-500;
suit for the groom – 500-800;
hall decoration – 500-700;
rings – 500-2000;
holiday menu – 50-110 euros per person;
cake – 300-500;
music and presenter – 1000-2500;
printing products – 400-600;
photographer – 500-1500.

Do not forget about the fee that you will have to pay for the ceremony - 100 euros. This also includes the cost of visa, flights and accommodation.

Bachelor and bachelorette parties

This tradition exists in every country in the world; in Germany it is called Der Junggesellenabschied. However, although the event is traditional in many countries, the Germans still have their own traditions. For example, in some cities in northern Rhine-Westphalia there is a custom of burning the groom's trousers as a sign of farewell to his bachelor life.

The ancient German tradition, according to which the bride's parents put aside one cent each from her childhood (previously it was a pfennig - the minimum monetary unit), has been preserved to this day. But this money is put aside for a reason; according to tradition, the bride must buy wedding shoes with the collected coins. This will mean that the future wife will not only be an excellent housewife, but also a faithful life partner. And on the wedding day you should put one cent in the bride's shoe. If you believe traditions, this will ensure a comfortable existence for the family. Performing this custom allows you to honor the history of weddings in Germany.

Bride's dress

German brides have a very democratic approach to choosing a wedding dress; they care little about the opinions of others; first of all, they care about their own comfort. Therefore, in this country, more often than in others, brides choose short dresses, suits and evening dresses for their wedding.

The dress of a German bride in general does not differ fundamentally from European wedding dresses. But the newlywed’s bouquet and wreath are made of white flowers. In Austria, a mandatory element of the bride's outfit is a sprig of myrtle, symbolizing longevity and heavenly blessing. Myrtle can be present in a bouquet or decorate the newlywed’s head. After the wedding, the bouquet and wreath are kept in the house as a family heirloom.

According to custom, the bride wears three clothes on her wedding day, an old one to continue family traditions, a new one in honor of new beginnings and optimism, and a third one - the bride puts on a blue garter for stockings, the headband should be taken from a friend who is happy in her family life. Shortly before the ceremony begins, a coin is placed in the bride's glove so that she can live in wealth.

There is only one tradition associated with outfits that German girls follow invariably: many of them from childhood begin to save for the bride’s shoes, and only small change ends up in the piggy bank. When the time comes, the bride buys shoes for herself using exactly the coins that she has saved for many years before the wedding.

What should friends do before marriage?

In addition to helping in preparation for the celebration, relatives and friends create a wedding newspaper with their own hands. In it they should describe the newlyweds’ first meeting, their love story, and favorite activities. The newspaper itself consists of funny collages and funny photographs of the bride and groom and their family and friends. You can also interview the newlyweds and write funny stories about love and family. The newspaper is presented to guests at an evening dinner as a kind souvenir that allows those present to learn more about the bride and groom. Wedding traditions in Germany are very interesting.

Introduction

“The history of ancestors is always interesting for those who are worthy to have a Fatherland” (N.M. Karamzin).

The pace of modern life is unusually high. Most people work to achieve career growth and earn money for a decent life. There is no time left for meetings and live communication with relatives and close people. Even letters are rarely written these days, communicating by phone or email. At this pace of life, people, unfortunately, forget about their roots and do not think about their ancestry. A person who does not know his roots, the history of his ancestors, his small homeland cannot truly love his people, his homeland. The science of ethnography studies the composition, origin, settlement, cultural and historical relationships of different peoples, material and spiritual culture, and peculiarities of life. And the further time passes, the more relevant the topic of researching the cultural roots of our fellow countrymen becomes. In different ways and for different reasons, people of different nationalities appeared in our village. The village of Karpovka was founded in 1909. The first settlers came from the Samara province from the villages of Ganovka and Karpovka. Due to historical events, the first German settlers, having gone through a difficult journey, appeared in our village in the 40s. Among the first were the families - Propp, Wagner, Weitz, and later the families - Suppes, (Appendix 1), Reshka, Eisner, Link, Brown, Erich, Schneider, etc. It was not easy for them to overcome national barriers, preserve their traditions and rituals by virtue of their scarcity. Native speech was inaudible in the houses. The children were brought up on local traditions, striving to be “like everyone else.” Families who spoke openly about their nationality and were proud of it were often placed on a par with the Nazis. Many sought to “get rid” of their nationality by altering their documents. As the years passed, my thinking changed. Many left for their historical homeland in Germany. “Being” German has become prestigious. However, the connection between generations was lost, the cultural values of this people were lost.

Currently, 4% of the total population of Germans live in Karpovka, and I would like them to know and honor the customs and traditions of their ancestors. It is unlikely that anyone will deny the fact that marriage is one of the most significant and memorable events in the life of any person, which is why this work will be devoted to wedding traditions.

Goal of the work:

study and research of wedding traditions of Siberian Germans.
In accordance with the purpose of the study, the following tasks
:

· study of relevant literature;

· based on the study of literature in the course of scientific research, find out existing wedding customs, signs, symbols, accessories.

· bringing the received material into conformity

Research methods:

· review of scientific literature;

· collecting material in school museums;

· survey of residents of the village of Karpovka (representatives of German nationality).

The beginning of the wedding

Like any wedding, a German one also begins with a civil ceremony in the registry office. A religious wedding ceremony in a church is also equivalent to it. Not all guests are invited to it, but only the closest relatives and friends, and the ceremony must take place before noon. This is because traditionally this time is considered the most favorable for holding such a solemn event. According to customs, it is the first rays of the sun that contribute to happiness in marriage. Previously, if for some reason it was not possible to hold a wedding at the right time, the clock in the church was set back.

In Germany, it is traditional for the groom to pick up the bride from home, preferably in a horse-drawn carriage. And the bride should under no circumstances look back on her way to church; such a sign means that a second marriage will be inevitable. The Germans call this custom Die Hochzeit. Yazidi weddings are often found in Germany.

What are the ways to organize a wedding in Germany?

Organizing a wedding event in a foreign country is a troublesome task. Therefore, dealing with this issue on your own will not be the best solution. To do this you will have to spend a lot of time and effort.

The process can be represented step by step as follows:

Choosing a ceremony location.
Book a hotel and purchase round-trip tickets.
Sign up for marriage registration at the registry office.
Choosing a wedding theme.
Restaurant order.
Car rent.
Registration of entry visa.

It is best to buy a dress, suit and rings at home if you want to save money. If the financial issue is not decisive, entrust this important matter to the wedding planner.

If you have to tie the knot with a representative of the German state, the procedure will look a little more complicated, since it will involve obtaining a fiancé visa.

To submit to the consulate, the future spouse will have to prepare proof of his financial solvency, sufficient to support a full-fledged family. How the ceremony takes place and what documents you will need for entry, read in our article “Marriage to a German”

Ceremony location

A celebration dedicated to the creation of a new family is always planned so that it remains in the memory for a long time. Therefore, choosing a venue is one of the important components of success. Lovers of romance have a large selection of medieval castles. As a rule, they are surrounded by beautiful parks and ponds, and this gives the right to hope for an impressive photo session.

Baden-Württemberg is a state in the southwestern part of the country, located on the border with Switzerland and France. One of the most picturesque places in Germany thanks to the Black Forest mountain range and the majestic Hohenzollern castle, built in the 19th century.
Bavaria – here you can have a truly royal wedding with a white carriage, a red carpet and a huge amount of flowers. In ancient times, crowned heads were married in these castles. The spirit of these ceremonies is still in the air. The pearl of Bavaria is Cologne. Located on the Rhine, the ancient city attracts romantics from all over the world with its centuries-old castles - Zatzwei, Eltz, Reichsburg Cochem. This corner of Germany is chosen as the location for their wedding by those who love peace and quiet.
Baden-Baden is one of the oldest German towns. It attracts tourists with its ancient architecture. It is from here that you can bring the most vivid and unique photographs.
Dusseldorf is the best place to go for those who prefer contemporary art. The decoration of the wedding celebration will be high-rise buildings, mirrored facades, and minimalist motifs in the exterior of the buildings.

Wedding ceremony

The ceremony begins with the bride and groom entering the church and, clinging to each other, slowly walking towards the altar. Previously, the passage along which the young people will go should be strewn with rose petals. It is traditionally believed that in this way you can attract the goddess of fertility, who will give the future husband and wife children.

The bride is given a wreath of precious stones and beads, which she must wear until midnight. The Germans also do not forget about the tradition of Queen Victoria, invented in the 19th century. She planted a small sprig of myrtle that she had taken from her older sister's wedding bouquet. The plant took root and grew well, so the queen inserted a sprig into the bouquet of her youngest daughter, her granddaughters, and even her great-granddaughters. Therefore, if a bride gets married for the first time, she takes a bouquet of myrtle with her down the aisle.

During the wedding ceremony, the newlyweds hold candles decorated with beautiful flowers and ribbons. And if it is customary for us to decorate cars with balls and various accessories, then in Germany each driver is given a white ribbon, which is attached to the car’s antenna. But the tradition of honking after marriage on the way to the banquet has taken root among the Germans. Traditions and weddings in Germany are closely intertwined, and young people try to follow the most important rules.

Wedding traditions of old and new Germany.

Wedding traditions of old and new Germany.
A wedding is a solemn ceremony dedicated to marriage. In all countries and religions, it is customary to enter into a union between loving people. A wedding symbolizes the beginning of family life, and this day is considered the happiest, the best. So the word “wedding” in German – Hochzeit – means “high time”. Wedding traditions in Germany are currently based on the Catholic religion, but they also retain pagan rituals. Now the minimum age of marriage according to the law of the Federal Republic of Germany for both parties is 18 years old, but, for example, in the Middle Ages it was much lower: for girls - 14, and for boys - 18. Due to the fact that Germany until the 18th century numerous wars and consisted of a large number of lands, traditions and marriage laws could differ significantly. Engagement in the families of wealthy burghers or landowners could occur even at the age of eight, and the peasants of the lands of Bavaria, without parental blessing, could marry only after the death of their father, often by this time they already had children. These days, the average age of newlyweds is around thirty, and most German couples don't get married at all. • Before the wedding. Acquaintance. Engagement Young people met at gatherings, in special unions of “adult boys and girls” and at holidays. Girls could be played at auctions, and the guy had to go in the evening to the girl he got by lot. There were many ways to let a young man know that a girl liked him, or, conversely, to refuse him. A guy could offer a girl a piece of white bread on the first date, and if she accepted it, then the sympathy was mutual. A bouquet of oat panicles with a rose was another symbol of love. The guy had to look after the girl, accompany her on holidays and dance with her. He tried to find out about the girl’s dowry before wooing her. Before the official matchmaking, the guy secretly, at night, met with the girl and asked her if she agreed to become his wife. There were other signs: a bottle of wine or apple cider meant matchmaking; if a girl served glasses with wine, it was consent; if not, it was refusal; an empty basket also meant refusal. The dishes served to the table when the matchmakers arrived were also symbols of either refusal (sandwich) or agreement (ham and eggs, pie). After the blessing of the parents, in the presence of all family members, the engagement took place, after which the marriage was to take place. Sometimes years passed before the newlyweds got married in church, because according to German traditions, the newlyweds had to live separately from their parents, and the mother-in-law had to prepare a new house and the bride’s dowry - sheets, dishes, linen, household utensils, which was at that time very expensive. During the engagement, the bride gave the groom a wedding shirt, which he wore a second time only on the day of death, and the groom gave the bride a ring, a silk scarf, and sometimes a gold cross. • From the moment of engagement until the wedding, it was believed that the newlyweds were the most vulnerable to an evil spirit, so the bride should not go out in the evenings or should cover her head with a scarf. During the engagement, the groom's retinue sang loud songs and made a deafening noise. The guys started shooting, banging lids and pots to ward off evil spirits. A groom who did not treat his retinue well was given a “cat concert,” another means of scaring away evil forces. There is still a tradition of organizing a Poltrabend on the Thursday before the wedding - “an evening of noise and din.” During this feast, laudatory or humorous speeches were made about children, about the future happiness and responsibilities of the young, and dishes were broken for good luck. Nowadays, this holiday is often organized for all friends and relatives who could not be invited to the wedding. The bride and groom must sweep and collect shards together before entering the house. • The English tradition of hen and stag parties (Junggesellenabschied) has become very popular in modern Germany. Most often, the bride and groom go to other cities, dress up in themed costumes, for example, cows - as a symbol of fertility for the bride, or an imp - the last opportunity for the groom to “walk free”. They sell various little things: candy, condoms, a kiss with the bride/groom, small bottles of schnapps - the more coins they collect, the happier their marriage will be. Seeing a bachelorette party brings happiness to passers-by. • Wedding day. Wedding. Until the beginning of the 20th century, the tradition of morning millet or bread “bride soup” existed. A symbol of the future economy of the young people, they often added a little animal feed and pieces of wood from household utensils to the soup. Before the newlyweds went to church, the groom's brother or close relative arranged a ransom. After the bride was transferred to a new family, the fire in the hearth was extinguished. On the way to church, the bride was not supposed to look back. If drops of rain fell on the bride's wreath, it promised misfortune. • The bride's wedding dress was a symbol of her purity and virginity. In the 18th century, only in the highest circles the bride wore white, and in the burgher environment the wedding dress was a black velvet or silk dress. Up until the 20th century, the peasant bride wore a black dress, a white veil, and a green wreath or crown. The bride was hidden under a veil, and the bridesmaids were dressed the same as the bride, so that the evil spirit would not recognize her. Sometimes the bride's hair was decorated with ears of wheat, they believed that this would bring fertility. A circle, a wreath, a ring are the main wedding symbols not only in Germany, but throughout the whole world. A closed wreath on the newlywed’s head and a garland of coniferous tree branches that lay around the couple in a full circle during the wedding were considered symbols of the girl’s innocence and purity. • The wedding took place strictly until 12 noon; it was believed that marriage in the increasing light would bring happiness. Sometimes, if the wedding was delayed, the clock hands were moved back. To protect young people from the evil eye, three crosses were drawn and candles were lit before entering the church. The newlyweds had to walk to the altar, pressing tightly against each other, so that no evil spirit would leak between them. After leaving the church, the young wife threw a handful of rye over her shoulder - it brings prosperity (this tradition has been preserved to this day). During the wedding, young people tried to put their hand on top, stand up faster or step on the bride’s foot; it was believed that then the husband would be the head of the house. • Wedding day. Feast. After the wedding, before entering the house, the newlywed was served wine; he had to sip the wine and pass it to his wife, and she threw the glass over her head. A broken glass meant a happy marriage. • During the celebration, the bride or some part of her clothing was stolen, and the groom was offered in return a “wild bride,” a bearded man in a wedding dress. • The guests danced between courses. And after the farewell dance of the bride with her relatives, the wreath was removed from her, and the veil was torn and distributed to unmarried girls. • In Bavaria, it was customary to put up a “children’s tree” - a 5-10 meter stick, which guests decorated with children’s clothes and toys. • At German weddings, it was customary to give gifts needed for the household, which the mother placed in a copper bowl covered with a plate and a towel. At the same time, they tried to remember the gifts so that they could give the same ones in return. They also gave money to pay for food. • The wedding night was an important part of the wedding ceremony, especially in the upper classes. The wedding bed in the house of the bride's father was made by a young girl, as if blessing the newlyweds. The guests accompanied the newlyweds to the bedroom, wishing them many children, especially boys. After the wedding night, the young husband took his wife to their new home. On the eighth day of their marriage, the couple went to visit their imprisoned mother, who treated them to traditional “happy soup.” • Nowadays, before the wedding night, the groom's friends freeze the symbolic key to the bedroom door, fill the entire room with balloons, unscrew the light bulbs throughout the house, and replace sugar with salt. Before being left alone, the newlyweds must sort out all the “mess” and solve all the riddles.

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Related materials:

History of wedding traditions around the world.
Wedding traditions in India
Wedding traditions in Turkey

What happens after marriage registration?

After registering a marriage, according to an old German tradition, the newly-made husband and wife are supposed to cut a real log with a real saw. This kind of work is not the easiest, and not everyone can handle it, but the newlyweds must show the guests what they are capable of. And this is not only physical strength, it is also the ability to achieve your goals. This tradition is quite old, but the Germans loved it so much that they continue to follow the custom to this day. Only now sawing a log also means equality, because this goal can be achieved only if you correctly arrange your forces, be able to not only hear, but also listen to each other, and do everything together.

Regarding the famous bride kidnapping, we can say that such a tradition exists in some regions of Germany even to this day. But it has strange rules: the groom’s friend “steals” the bride in one of the local bars, where the groom must find his beloved. The groom can walk around the establishments for a long time and have a lot of fun, because in every bar where the bride is not there, the newly-made husband must drink an alcoholic drink, also treating his friends. And when the bride and her kidnapper are found, the groom must pay their bill as well.

But instead of the usual throwing of a bouquet to unmarried girlfriends in Germany, there is a tradition called the “Veil Dance.” During one of the final dances, unmarried wedding guests must tear off a piece of the veil. This will mark an early marriage.

The veil dance in some regions is a completely different tradition, which involves those wishing to dance with the bride or groom having to put money in the veil.

Traditions after the celebration

When the main ceremony is completed, the young couple again have dinner, either at their home or at the house of the bride's parents. We call this the second day of celebration. Guests and newly-made husband and wife have fun, organize competitions, eat and drink what is left from the first day of the holiday. And it’s a great sign for newlyweds if many children are present on the second day, and as many people as possible are invited to the event itself.

On the second day of the celebration, some Germans also try to distract the husband and take the bride away from under his nose. If the friends succeed, then the husband's job is to use written clues to find his wife. And of course, you will have to pay a fine for losing sight of your love. The tradition is also accompanied by songs, dances and promises to perform all household duties and always help the wife.

Wedding feast traditions

The parties plan the wedding menu with special care. There are almost no restrictions, the only condition is the number of dishes: there must be at least 20 of them. In this case, guests, if desired, can take treats from the wedding table to their home. The wedding table menu is usually varied and depends on the location of the ceremony. For example, in the Lower Rhine, soup with meat, potatoes, and sauerkraut are especially revered. In Bavaria, they prefer noodle soup, fried sausages and baked carp.

By the way, in Bavaria you can try traditional German wedding soup. It even has its own name - bridesmaid. It consists of meat broth prepared according to a special recipe with the addition of pieces of bread. In it, guests may come across such items as wood chips, parts of brooms and other, at first glance, unnecessary little things. But according to local customs, if the bride tastes this soup herself, she will become an ideal housewife even with minimal experience.

The symbolism of the cake played a special role in the celebration. It traditionally had 5 main layers, which symbolized the 5 main stages of human life from birth to death.

The end of the wedding feast is symbolized by walking along a path made of pine needles. It is this plant that is believed in Germany to be able to bring financial wealth and a stable position into a couple’s life. During the passage, the newlyweds are traditionally sprinkled with rice.

It’s also worth saying a few words about the newlyweds’ first dance. Afterwards, the bride invites her father to dance, and the groom, for his part, invites his mother. The dance program should be completed by a couple of the groom's mother and the bride's father performing a waltz.

Expenditure part

A wedding in any country is an expensive event. According to statistics, the average amount that modern Germans spend on a celebration varies from 6,000 to 12,000 euros. And as practice shows, only 5% of spouses refuse a honeymoon. Statisticians even calculated what and how much money the average young couple spends on:

Wedding dress - from 800 to 1500 euros.
Hairstyle and festive makeup – from 200 to 400 euros.
Groom's festive suit - from 500 to 800 euros.
Rent of a banquet hall – from 500 to 700 euros.
Decorating the hall - from 500 to 700 euros.
Wedding rings – from 500 to 2000 thousand euros.
Festive table - from 50 to 110 euros per person.
Cake – from 300 to 500 euros.
Carriage for newlyweds (carriage or car) – from 300 to 600 euros.
Invitations – approximately 500 euros.
Musical accompaniment – from 1000 to 2500 thousand euros.
Photographer – from 500 to 1500 euros.
State duty – 100 euros.

Some couples have to take out a bank loan to organize a wedding, but traditionally the costs are divided in half by the parents of the bride and groom if the young couple are not yet ready to bear the expenses. The question remains open: what do they give for a wedding in Germany? Everything here is extremely simple: the bride and groom make a list of necessary things in advance, and if there is none, then monetary amounts are considered the ideal gift.

German wedding traditions are very ancient, they have developed over several centuries and are sacredly revered to this day. The Germans take responsibility for organizing the holiday, and a wedding usually lasts three days. German traditions are also skillfully combined with Russian weddings in Germany.

Preparing gifts

German wedding traditions regarding gifts deserve special attention. And here we must pay tribute to the practicality and foresight of the burghers.

Most often, notes are sent to all invitees while the newlyweds are enjoying their honeymoon, telling them what to give as a gift and on what day it can be delivered. When the newly-made spouses arrive, a whole heap of gifts will be waiting for them, most importantly, those necessary for their life together.

The second way to congratulate the newlyweds is to present them with a certain amount. Sometimes the heroes of the occasion open a special wedding account to which all guests can transfer a “gift”. There are often cases when a special box is installed at the place of celebration, where everyone entering can put their congratulations. But how much is given for a wedding depends on the degree of relationship with the newlyweds.