A wedding without a wedding or celebration

Most people associate a wedding with a rich feast, songs and dances, toasts, with obligatory guests, and everyone is invited: relatives, colleagues, friends, acquaintances of acquaintances. The traditions and customs of most peoples on the planet clearly say: there is no marriage without festivities and rituals. However, more and more often young people choose to celebrate in the “wedding without a wedding” format. They prefer to crowds of tipsy guests and tiresome organizational fuss: cozy gatherings in a cafe in the company of their closest and dearest people; an unforgettable, romantic day with your favorite entertainment; the trip of your dreams. How does a wedding without guests usually take place?

The appearance of a wedding without a celebration

A wedding without guests is nothing new. In different countries, in different years, there was a tradition of simplified marriages. In the Union, a couple could simply sign at the nearest registry office, then modestly celebrate the event together or in a narrow circle of their closest people. The reason is the low standard of living of the majority of the population and the firm belief that luxurious, expensive weddings are a relic of the capitalist past. Later, with the growth of prosperity, the fashion returned for riotous weddings in restaurants, with many invited guests, the number of which reached hundreds. They celebrated on a grand scale in the courtyards of private houses, in apartments, and in nature.

This practice also existed abroad. In France, since 1954, Catholic weddings have lost their legal force, becoming simply a beautiful rite at the request of the newlyweds. It was enough for the bride and groom to register their marriage at the local city hall, and further events depended entirely on the wishes and financial capabilities of the young people.

What to gift

The absence of a magnificent celebration is not a reason not to congratulate the new family. Of course, gifts may not be as significant as at a usual celebration. But it’s also impolite to give outright trifles, except as a funny addition. In addition to money and certificates to various stores, you can give:

beautiful and useful things for general everyday life (interior items, dishes, bed linen);
household appliances or useful gadgets (from an electric waffle iron to a washing machine);
individual gifts (couple portrait, jewelry);
all kinds of certificates for spending time as a couple (visiting a spa, restaurant, sanatorium);
hand-made or custom-made items - a hand-painted vase or custom-made bed linen will be a welcome gift for any couple.

The main rule is that the item must be of high quality. Let it be the proverbial vase or frying pan, but not bought “on occasion”, but chosen with soul, in beautiful packaging, from a reliable brand/manufacturer, which you can use with pleasure.

This video shows how a non-ceremonial marriage registration takes place:

Newlyweds first of all appreciate attention, so congratulating them on their new status with a bouquet of flowers and sincere wishes is also always appropriate.

To legitimize a relationship informally is a convenient and quick way to legitimize a relationship without spending extra time and money. It is not without reason that they say that the strength of a future family does not depend on the funds invested in a magnificent wedding. To create a happy couple, you only need love and a sincere, strong desire to be together. And it doesn’t matter how much the bride’s dress costs or what kind of champagne is poured into the glasses, right?

A magnificent celebration or a wedding for two?

When planning to found a new unit of society, the young people try to discuss all the details of the upcoming event. The date is set, the format and style of the wedding is chosen. Will it only be registration at the registry office, or will there also be a wedding in the church? Is it worth inviting guests and who exactly? What expenses can newlyweds afford? A wedding without people has its advantages and disadvantages, so when making a decision, you need to carefully weigh the pros and cons.

Positive aspects of a wedding without guests

Preparing for a traditional wedding is a long, very tedious process that requires remarkable organizational skills, travel, negotiations with various people who are not always pleasant to talk to. And if it turns out that the performers failed, then a serious nervous load is added to the long-standing physical and moral fatigue. It is not surprising that young people arrive at the finish line in a state of squeezed lemon, but they still have to “work out” all the special events with an A plus! A wedding for only two people gets rid of the lion's share of pre-wedding worries and hassles, and the newlyweds have the energy left for sincere fun, courtship and a little extravagant actions.
A formal wedding with all the trappings is not a cheap pleasure. The banquet alone costs a considerable amount, and gifts, according to statistics, very rarely cover the costs. If young people do not want to start their lives with large loans or spend all their savings on chic disposable outfits, then a wedding without a celebration is the most profitable and ideal option for them. You can invest your finances in a honeymoon, purchase real estate, or spend it on yourself and your loved ones.
By refusing mass celebrations, the bride and groom leave themselves the greatest possible freedom of choice. They do not need to adapt to someone else’s wishes, health conditions, or correlate their plans with the work schedule or place of residence of one of their relatives. They can go wherever they want, have a dizzying voyage or a crazy wedding while skydiving. Choose only those dishes that they like, wear loose clothes that do not restrict movement.

Disadvantages of registering without a holiday

Many brides dream of feeling like a princess, a queen at their wedding. Walk under admiring glances in a magnificent outfit, receive compliments and wishes for a happy life from all sides, communicate and shine. Of course, this is impossible without a mass of enthusiastic guests, and such girls are unlikely to like a modest wedding.
Relatives and acquaintances who are confronted with the fact that there will be no wedding as such may be mortally offended. Their disappointment sometimes results in a complete cessation of communication with the married couple. If there are very touchy people among your loved ones or old traditions are strong in the family, when the absence of special events is perceived as blasphemy, you should think carefully. Most likely, in such a situation, the newlyweds will not be able to correctly explain their position.
The lack of gifts is also an important factor. If the young people do not want to invite guests, then there will be no presents. However, most often they give either money or not too expensive things for a wedding.

Each couple must make their own decision, guided by their own preferences. If the pros significantly outweigh the cons, go for it! Treat yourself to an unforgettable fireworks display of emotions or a tender romantic day with a candlelight dinner, admiring a magnificent sunset on the seashore or a boat trip.

Let's move on to tactics. There are at least three ways out of this situation:

1. Two weddings.

An increasingly popular option. One day - with relatives and the registry office, toastmaster, ransom, loaf, Verka Serduchka. The second - with friends and off-site registration, barbecue, cottage, Rammstein)))) Or one wedding - big and magnificent, with everyone, everyone, and the second - a charming ceremony for two during a honeymoon. There are plenty of options. Of course, there is a BUT. Two weddings will cost more than one. If you choose this option, I advise you to make one of the two holidays more modest, so as not to incur huge expenses (naturally, it is better to pay less attention to the wedding that is less to your liking). Another option for solving the problem is for one wedding to be fully paid for by the parents (“for themselves”), and for the second by the newlyweds.

2. Wedding for two.

Already a fairly common holiday format. Suitable for those couples who are ready to confront their relatives with a fact: we got married. It is fraught with grievances, but... nothing can be done. Just accept and come to terms with it. A wedding for two is good with an endless variety of options - from the most economical to the luxurious. Moreover, both options can be incredibly beautiful. You can hold such a wedding virtually anywhere and anytime. But you won’t have to adapt to anyone - it will only be your holiday. A wedding for two is a huge space for creativity, where you can realize the most original and crazy ideas!

3. Wedding abroad.

A very elegant, albeit expensive option. I don’t think that any of the parents will refuse to go to Greece, the Dominican Republic or the Czech Republic. But you can’t take everyone’s relatives and friends abroad, and not everyone can do it (both for financial reasons and because of the banal lack of a foreign passport). A wedding abroad is a priori a very beautiful event, and a priori only for the closest people. In addition, when it comes to organizing a wedding abroad, your parents are incompetent and will not be able to impose their opinion. As a rule, such weddings are organized by special agencies - they will take care of all the hassle.

By the way, about agencies. If you have enough funds, a good option to solve problems is to hire a professional wedding planner

, explaining the situation to him. Then it will be his task to convince your parents of the correctness of your vision of the wedding. Experts do this much better.

And finally. Dear future newlyweds, you will face many difficulties while preparing for your wedding. But a wedding is only the beginning of a long and long journey. The most important thing is mutual understanding and agreement in your couple. If it is there, you won’t have any problems! Remember this.

And may you be happy!

How to delicately announce your decision to your relatives?

If families on both sides are distinguished by common sense and modern views, the desire of the newlyweds to get married in a modest atmosphere does not encounter any obstacles. They will be supported, given practical advice and guidance. But sometimes the opinion of parents and close relatives, who want to do everything “as it should be,” becomes a huge problem. How to convince your relatives, avoid colossal moral pressure and at the same time not spoil the relationship?

In some cases, the bride and groom, fearing the reaction of their families, get married secretly, notifying their relatives after the fact. Not a very good option, since sooner or later the act will become the property of society, and a wave of reproaches, insults and claims will fall on the young people.
You can approach the problem creatively: ask your elders for advice, listing point by point all the negative aspects of a big wedding. Flatly refuse to go into debt or accept major help from parents, emphasizing the desire to start an independent life. Draw their attention to the fact that the costs of a modern wedding rarely pay off, since most Russians can only dream of gifts in the form of luxurious mansions, tropical islands and thousands of dollars in envelopes.
It would be a good idea to ask your dear relatives for an original wedding gift: to allow you to spend this day the way the newlyweds want, according to their own choice. Few people can refuse. And so that parents do not feel deprived, it is worth inviting them to register, and then sending them to a good restaurant, where the feast will already be paid for.

Also, a good way out of the situation would be gatherings in a cafe for friends and close relatives, arranged a few days before registration or a little later, as is convenient for the young people. Such a feast is much simpler than a wedding banquet, cheaper, and more relaxed. And the wishes for a happy life are no less sincere. It should also be specifically clarified that no gifts are needed so as not to put the invitees in an awkward position.

How to decorate a table beautifully

It will be doubly pleasant for guests to receive treats from a beautifully set table. Buffet tables are located in two ways: against the wall and in the middle of the room. The latter method is more practical; it allows you to approach the table from both sides. Alcohol, soft drinks, fruits are placed in the center of the table. Glasses and shot glasses are placed behind them. Plates for guests are not laid out, but placed in stacks of 10 pieces, next to them are the same number of forks and half as many knives.

Bread and snacks are served no earlier than 30 minutes before the start of the buffet. In addition to cutlery, each table is served with a jar of pepper, salt, and sauces.

Decorating holiday dishes is best left to professionals.

How to do it beautifully yourself, watch the video:

Registration at the registry office without a wedding

The simple procedure for registering a marriage is noticeably different from the solemn one. In the second case, the ceremony may be delayed for a month or more due to the heavy workload of the registry office staff. In addition, such weddings with obligatory music, guests and good wishes are held only on certain days of the week.

You can sign in the office on any weekday by paying the minimum state fee. There is no need to stand in line and wear special outfits, just a beautiful dress and suit, or even casual clothes. The wedding itself takes just a few minutes. You can invite your own photographer or agree to the services of a person who usually takes pictures of celebrations at the registry office.

Electronic application

Moscow registry offices provide a service for electronic date booking. This method is suitable for those who do not want to stand in lines or spend the night waiting outside the registry office doors. To do this, go to the website, select a date and receive a coupon. Then print the ticket and come with your application at the appointed time.

This coupon cannot be transferred to other people, as it is issued using passport details. You immediately see what free numbers are available. If you fail to arrive at the required time, then the reservation is canceled and you will have to complete the procedure again.

Statistics on available dates are available on the Moscow government website. First, select the registry office and date, then click the button to view the calendar. In the image below we show how to do this.

After this, a calendar will open on which you can mark the desired date.

Bridal outfits

There are no rules regulating the dress code for a wedding without guests. It is difficult to surprise employees of the registry office and other institutions that the newly-minted spouses plan to visit. Therefore, clothes can be anything.

For the groom

Classic suit.
Jeans and a shirt, or straight trousers with a pullover or sweater.
In the summer, you may prefer light linen trousers and a T-shirt.

For the bride

Long white dress with a simple silhouette, mini dress.
Cocktail dress, evening dress.
A skirt with a blouse or a classic two-piece with a jacket or vest.
Pantsuit or versatile jeans with a blouse or T-shirt.
Sundress from any fabric, favorite dress.

The main rule in choosing clothes for lovers is that they should be in the same style and not shock others too much. Beach shorts or a radically revealing outfit are not a good idea for a formal event. It would also look ridiculous to see a girl in a T-shirt and jeans next to a young man in a classic suit, or a guy in informal attire next to a dressed-up beauty in an evening dress. If you are planning a photo shoot, themed costumes are appropriate, which will add an interesting twist to the ceremony - prince and princess, pirates, elves, dudes, etc.

Image of the bride and groom

The bride's appearance must be selected based on her image. Summer is a popular time for stylish and beautiful weddings. In the warm season, the dress should be comfortable and light (made of chiffon, organza, silk, lace, guipure, tulle).

Shoes must be open (sandals, sandals, summer boots). If you plan to go outdoors, you need to prepare another pair of shoes that will be comfortable for you to move around in.

The hairstyle should be light and natural. Bunches, loose hair, and curls are suitable. You can decorate them with flowers or ethnic accessories. Makeup must be waterproof and have sun protection. It is better to focus on healthy skin tone, without bright color combinations. Naturalness is a priority. The emphasis should be on simplicity.

For winter, the bride's look should be warm and cozy. The dress is made of dense materials that will prevent you from freezing and will keep the cold out. Dress models must be closed, with original decorative details.

Celebrating a wedding without guests

The absence of guests at the wedding does not mean that the newlyweds themselves should be sad and locked within four walls. There are many wonderful ideas, because young spouses are absolutely free in their choice!

A romantic getaway for several days or even weeks. You can go to a resort, on a tour of Russia, Europe or America. Buy tickets on an ocean liner or rent a room in a forest or mountain boarding house.
Favorite hobbies. Depending on the wishes of the newlyweds, you can take a ride on river transport or rent a stroller drawn by white trotters. Arrange a city tour, stopping at your favorite bars and relaxing in the park. Go to the shore of a lake, sea, river, with a tent, guitar and barbecue. Relax your soul by putting together an excellent cultural program with trips to museums, theaters, and cinema.
For lovers of extreme tourism, now is the time to go on a wedding bike ride, have an ATV race, or go to the mountains. It would be interesting to go rafting on rivers, go on a multi-day hike on horseback, or visit places that are iconic for all tourists.
If outdoor recreation doesn’t appeal to you, you can rent a table in a good restaurant, including one with a national menu. Dine on board the ship or on the terrace of a high-rise building, arrange a romantic candlelit dinner with an individual music program for only two. To do this, they usually hire a good performer, singer or song and dance group.

Sometimes young people still want to organize a small celebration for their closest friends and relatives, but there is no desire to spend money on a restaurant banquet hall. In this case, a trip to nature is perfect, with an appropriate menu and disposable tableware, competitions and dancing to music. In the same format, you can celebrate a wedding in your apartment or in the courtyard of a private house, without unnecessary expenses. The menu should be thought out so that there are no large surpluses and too exotic dishes.

Buffet instead of a banquet

If you have an idea to hold a wedding without a banquet, you can arrange it with a buffet. This is a small post-wedding event that is appropriate to organize even if only the registry office is supposed to be the main wedding ceremony.

Here are a few basic steps that will tell you how to hold a wedding without a traditional banquet, but brightly and tastefully:

invite a small jazz orchestra or just musicians who will accompany the entire event. As a last resort, you can limit yourself to a good stereo system with powerful speakers;
The program of such a celebration necessarily includes a photo session of the newlyweds, dancing to live music;
gifts to the newlyweds from the guests.

Such a buffet in itself can be interesting are sufficiently varied, prepared at the highest level and decorated in an original way.

There are many menu options - it all depends on the skill and imagination of the chefs and the budget spent for these purposes.

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However, a buffet table presupposes a certain set of dishes that must be present on the table and will become its basis at any celebration in this format:

cold appetizers, especially canapés - this is the most common type of appetizer, which can consist of anything: from meat and fish to simple vegetables;
fruits, cut into pieces;
seafood decorated with herbs;
various salads;
cakes, pastries, sweets.

A buffet table does not imply abundant dishes, long gatherings, or intricate competitions and fits perfectly into a wedding, where the main celebration is only registration. Everything should be relaxed, tasty and elegant, and most importantly, comfortable.

It is important to position the tables correctly so that they do not stand against the wall, but in the middle of the room. In this case, it will be easy for guests to approach them from any direction, and there will be no crowds in which guests will interfere with each other’s elbows or have to wait until they can come up for the next dish.

In summer, it is best to organize this kind of event directly in the open air, placing tables on the street. Don't forget about the pleasant musical accompaniment. To do this, it is not even necessary to invite a live orchestra, but simply connect powerful speakers to the equipment. An excellent place for such a celebration is a country house.

Wedding photo shoot

The memory of the most exciting event in the lives of the newlyweds should remain for them and their children and friends, regardless of the presence or absence of guests at the wedding. You can, of course, shoot on your own, fortunately, any photo and video equipment is available today; there are cameras on cell phones and any laptop. But it is better to entrust the photo shoot to a professional. You can hire a person for the whole day or several hours, choosing a suitable background for gorgeous photos. Photos taken outdoors, on board a river yacht, in a gilded horse-drawn carriage or in an antique convertible are impressive. If everyday clothes are confusing, you can rent magnificent costumes in any theme you like, including vintage and fantasy, for the duration of the photo shoot. Collected in the family photo and video archive, such stories evoke a lot of positive emotions and awaken memories of the feelings that the newlyweds experienced on their wedding day.

A wedding without a wedding is an excellent solution for those who are tired of the everyday hustle and bustle, imposed communication, and want to devote this significant day entirely to the most dear, beloved person in the world. This is a holiday exclusively for two loving hearts, without regard to the opinions and desires of the guests. It must be carried out in such a way that the memory of this day remains for many years. Make your cherished dreams come true by capturing happy, loving faces in photos and videos.

But you can get married not only in a black dress: fashion trends

Fashion trends 2020 are full of variety. Bridal dresses are presented in different styles, without boundaries and frames for the future bride.

Fashion trends:

Victorian lace - openwork models will be a real hit. They are chosen by elegant brides who prefer something exclusive. Lace goes well with a Spanish-style veil.
Gothic with a stand-up collar is preferable in the cold season. The models visually lengthen the silhouette and are suitable for any figure. The style is aristocratic and elegant.
Trousers, overalls - combinations of skirts and trousers in any shade will be the most fashionable look. You can safely turn to eclecticism or maintain conservatism. Dressing in a women's wedding jumpsuit is trendy. Pants with a luxurious lace train or a large bow are especially good. Don't forget about wedding shorts.
Open shoulders - such dresses have not gone away, but this year the trend has been updated with puffy sleeves. Envious women will dream of such an outfit, reminiscent of images from the Renaissance.
Flowing styles - femininity is always relevant. But in 2020, women are asked to abandon corsets and crinolines, leaving the most natural silhouette.

According to signs, a dark bride's outfit and a wedding in a gothic, black style do not bode well. However, superstitions have long been refuted by thousands of happy families who decided to have their own unusual holiday.

Decor

The lion's share of all allocated money is spent on wedding decor. Therefore, couples, wanting to save money, often refuse any decorations. You shouldn't do that.

“My advice is to stick with your wedding decor,” says Jess. — It is not necessary to put on a fluffy dress and tailcoat, install a lush arch and release doves into the sky. But choose something that will make this day special for you. You'll save money by trimming your guest list so you can afford a little decor."

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If you are celebrating a wedding outdoors, it could just be a small arch. If you are going to celebrate it in a restaurant, decorate the meeting place with dried flowers. Then you can take them home: they are stored for years and will remind you of the wedding.