Wedding rings are a symbol of the eternal love of spouses, which continues even after the death of the other half, and therefore many widows leave this important decoration on themselves in memory of their loved one. But the question arises, how to wear such a jewel now? A huge number of canons, traditions and superstitions prescribe various, often contradictory options, so understanding them is not so easy.
How to wear it for widowers?
If a widow, according to the most widespread tradition both in Orthodoxy and in secular etiquette, wore a wedding ring on the ring finger of her right hand, then there are six main options for what to do:
- Transferring your own wedding ring to your left hand is the most common solution, clearly understood by people with a wide variety of cultural backgrounds;
- Take off your jewelry and put the deceased’s ring on the left one;
- Leave your ring on your right hand, and put the deceased’s jewelry on your left hand;
- Transfer both rings to your left hand;
- Keep your own jewelry on the right, and wear your husband’s jewelry on a chain around your neck;
- Leave the deceased’s ring on it, and put your own in the coffin.
Advice! Sometimes it makes sense to even give the ring as charity to the church, asking them to pray for the repose of the soul of the deceased.
Each of these decisions is acceptable, and a woman's choice depends on many factors. For some, it seems more appropriate to preserve the memory of the deceased without displaying it, and in this case, the decoration can be left at home - in the red corner near the icons or in a jewelry box.
If the widow decides to keep the jewelry and continue to wear it, then, in addition to the symbolic level, the decision will also be influenced by the physical factor. Men's rings are usually much larger and may not fit even the largest middle or thumb fingers.
Sometimes the size of the jewelry can be reduced, but not always, especially if the jewelry has engraving or inlay. In this case, various options are acceptable - with a chain or with transfer to another finger.
Tribute to memory
If one of the spouses died, most widows and widowers decided to put the ring of their deceased loved one on their finger - this is a kind of tribute to memory. The meaning of this tradition is simple: death destroyed the happy union of two lovers, but love and the memory of it live forever. Widows usually wear wedding rings as a reminder of the days when they were in love and happy.
Have you lost your spouse and want to pay tribute to him? You can safely wear your loved one’s ring, because it definitely won’t do any harm.
The question of which hand and finger to wear a wedding ring for a widow is very relevant, and is asked by millions of widows and widowers around the world. In fact, after the death of one of the spouses, a marriage is considered terminated, and if the widow meets a new lover, she can safely get married. But, according to sociological surveys, many women prefer to remain faithful to their lover and never get married again or live in a civil marriage. Representatives of the fair sex miss their lost loved one so much that they decide to put his wedding ring on their finger.
Wedding rings
Signs and traditions
Wedding rings, including widow's rings, are surrounded by a huge number of different superstitions.
Popular wisdom does not recommend wearing the jewelry of dead people, as it is believed that precious metals absorb energy. That is, both illness and accident seem to be imprinted on the ring and inevitably affect the new owner, worsening his health and well-being.
For the same reason, in no case should such rings be inherited by children and other younger relatives, since the new couple may repeat the tragic fate of the previous one.
But with rings belonging to spouses who happily celebrated their silver or even golden anniversary, everything is not so simple. Some signs consider such a gift to children to be a very good sign, protecting the new family from any problems. Others still do not recommend making such gifts, since children with a given ring will steal the happiness of their parents.
A ring that falls during a wedding or social ceremony is a sign of imminent separation and the possible death of the other half. To avoid a terrible fate, you should thread a regular thread through the jewelry for a while, and then burn it along with the accumulated negative energy.
How to relate to such beliefs, everyone decides for himself. On the one hand, wisdom preserved over the centuries often has some basis, on the other hand, the Orthodox Church does not have a very positive attitude towards any signs.
Can a widow wear a wedding ring?
You can wear the product, but you should do it as carefully as possible. It all depends on the character of the person, as well as his attitude towards the deceased. If a person sincerely believes that this item will protect him, then it will be so. But, if the widow is tormented by doubts and she is afraid of negative energy, then it is better to give the ring to the relatives of the deceased, or simply remove it from sight.
Most often, people simply put away the product as a keepsake, but at the same time that it does not remind of the tragedy. Psychics, in turn, believe that in no case should you wear the product after death - because of this, the soul of the deceased may gravitate back to his family, which can cause him to get lost.
However, the church, on the contrary, disputes this version, saying that it is still possible to wear the product. A widow is even allowed to wear the ring of the deceased, since there is the strongest connection between lovers.
What do the two rings on your left hand mean?
Such a position of jewelry really quite often means widowhood, but you should not give an unambiguous interpretation if you don’t know the person well:
- Very often girls wear an engagement ring on their left hand along with a wedding ring on their right;
- This may also mean that the spouses are Catholics or even atheists.
Important! Sometimes, due to injury, wearing any jewelry on the right hand becomes uncomfortable or simply impossible, and in this case the left remains the only alternative.
Why is it worn on the ring finger?
Which finger the jewelry is placed on is also important. Explanations exist so far only in the form of hypotheses:
- In the Chinese tradition, each finger is responsible for a part of the family: the thumb is the parents, the index finger is the sisters and brothers, the middle finger is the person himself, the ring finger is his spouse, and the little finger is the children. Accordingly, the engagement ring is worn on the nameless one.
- In the European tradition, it is believed that each part of the palm is connected to other parts of the body. If you massage it correctly, it will have a positive effect on your health. The ring finger is traditionally considered to be associated with the heart.
Interestingly, fingers could change in different cultures. Consolidation occurred relatively recently by historical standards.
View of religion
World religions have different attitudes towards wedding rings in general, and widow's rings in particular.
In Orthodoxy, wedding jewelry is worn on the right hand, which is used to make the sign of the cross and behind which, according to legend, there is a guardian angel. After the death of a spouse, one’s ring is moved to the left hand, and the second one is left with the deceased. A more preferable option is to donate your jewelry to a parish. Orthodox Christians can leave a treasure from their deceased home next to the icons in the red corner.
Catholics wear their wedding band on their left hand, and after widowhood they change it to their right hand or take it off altogether.
In Judaism, only women wear a wedding ring as a sign of belonging to their spouse. In the event of the death of the other half, the widow simply removes the jewelry , and then can either keep it in the house or give it to charity.
In Islam, there is basically no tradition of exchanging wedding rings. Men are prohibited from wearing gold, and even silver jewelry must be extremely small and discreet. But as a wedding gift for the bride, various jewelry, rings, and earrings are often presented. There is no need to change the position of the jewelry after the death of the husband.
Buddhists sometimes exchange rings to unite the energies and destinies of spouses, but this is not a mandatory wedding tradition. After widowhood, it is better to donate the jewelry to charity so as not to create a connection, preventing the deceased from incarnating in a new life.
View of Orthodox priests
The Orthodox Church believes that keeping a wedding ring is a completely acceptable solution. There are no prohibitions, so everything depends only on the person and his views.
The only objection that the church points out is the transfer of the product to children. The clergy are against such actions because it can cause serious harm to the child. In addition to the psychological impact, the child may develop ailments and various diseases, since the energy of the deceased person is simply unacceptable for him.
If there is no one close to you to give this item to, and the widow herself is afraid to keep it at home, then the priests offer to take the rings to the church for the purpose of charity. All rings will be recycled and used to improve the temple.
Why does the chain get twisted?
What jewelry should Orthodox Christians not wear?
Recommendations from psychologists
The main advice of psychologists is that the decision made by the widow or widower be comfortable for them.
If it is painful for a woman or a man to come across constant reminders of the lost and ended happiness together, then it is better not to leave such a significant thing on your hand, so as not to reopen the wound.
If, on the contrary, the presence of a ring creates a feeling of security and that a loved one is looking after your other half from the other world, then the jewelry should be left.
Advice! For religious widows, it is recommended to ask for advice from a confessor, since the support of significant people at such a difficult moment is incredibly important.
Is it possible to wear a ring after the death of a husband according to folk signs?
There is a small problem - men's rings are much larger than women's, and it is not always possible to put a husband's engagement ring even on the thumb or middle finger. In this case, it can be reduced or hung on a chain and worn around the neck. Widowers wear the ring in the same way as widows - the options are the same for both men and women.
It indicates an imperious nature that knows how to subjugate and control people. Such people are reasonable and analyze their actions.
Such rings can be family jewels, passed down from generation to generation. In Orthodox Russia, the engagement ring is worn on the ring finger of the bride's right hand, who wears it without removing it until the day of the official wedding. Subsequently, it can be worn over the wedding band or kept as a family heirloom.
In the countries of the European continent and in the USA, the ring is put on and worn on the left hand, on the same ring finger.
Informed decision
It is psychologically difficult for a widow to immediately make a decision about engagement rings. She is bombarded by the advice of relatives, the opinion of society, religious canons and norms. Only lastly does a woman listen to her own feelings. But conflicting opinions sometimes prevent a lady from making a decision.
In the case of an engagement ring, there are no accepted standards and no right decision that is acceptable to every person. For some, it is important to observe religious dogma, for others, public morality is important, and another lady cannot imagine her life without signs of fidelity to her late spouse. Therefore, every widow has the right to choose, and no one can condemn her if she refuses to wear wedding rings at all.
