Why do they count at a wedding when the bride and groom kiss?

How to kiss in public?

How to kiss the bride and groom at a wedding? There are several general rules regarding aesthetics :

Kisses should be modest; sensual expressions of passion are best left for the wedding night.
You need to try to kiss so as not to squish your noses against each other’s cheeks.
A light, almost weightless touch with your lips will be quite enough.
There is no need to reach a meter away from each other, stretching out your necks, forming your lips like a tube - unless this is a staged funny smack between two mimes.
It is better to kiss without tongue so that the bride's makeup does not smudge.
Instead of lips, you can kiss your beloved on the cheek, neck, hand: it looks touching and romantic.

If young people are embarrassed to show feelings in this way, then you can perceive it as a kind of game, exchanging light, quick smacks. To overcome the feeling of embarrassment, spouses who have already had a wedding are advised to relax , without worrying about how beautiful or natural the kiss will be. There is no need to try to please anyone; after all, a wedding is a celebration of the newlyweds.

If the presenter shouts “Bitterly” too often, you can gently ask him to moderate his ardor slightly

To prevent the bride's makeup from smudging, it is better to have lipstick or gloss with a mirror at the ready. For more permanent makeup, you can get a tattoo or use a pencil to outline the contour.

Lipstick for kissing at a wedding

Kisses from the point of view of Orthodoxy

Kissing before marriage according to Orthodoxy is not considered a sin, but it brings a person to a dangerous line, since sensual and passionate kisses inflame a sinful feeling of lust.

Of course, any couple before marriage wants to show tender feelings for their loved one, but the church warns against overly ardent hugs and caresses, limiting themselves to innocent kisses on the cheek, forehead or shoulder in order to maintain purity before marriage.

A modest kiss on the shoulder at a wedding

A wedding kiss is, first of all, proof of love and tenderness between the bride and groom.

The main thing is that the newlyweds themselves feel comfortable and relaxed while enjoying the holiday. There is nothing wrong with not kissing at a wedding or exchanging small pecks.

Scaring away evil spirits

Our ancestors were very superstitious people, they learned the weather simply by looking at the stars, and believed in the existence of evil spirits and evil spirits. They also believed that one of the guests could damage the bride. And if you shout about what is bitter, then the evil spirits will think that everything is bad at the wedding anyway and will leave. Today it seems a little funny and naive, but the inhabitants of past centuries firmly believed in the power of this ritual.

IMPORTANT TO KNOW: Favorable days for a wedding in 2022: the best dates

Our Wedding Kiss - Peanut Butter Fingers

Remember how I said that if my workout doesn't happen before noon, it won't happen? Today at 11:59 am I took my favorite running partner on leash for a run around our neighborhood. We just did my voluntary shutdown!

We covered five miles and I wore long sleeves for the first time this fall!

It's so nice to run outside when you don't feel like the sun is going to burn your face.

Dinner

Right after we got home, I made myself some buttered cinnamon raisin toast to eat before showering and preparing my lunch for the day.

Today's lunch was a salad, which I ate straight from the bath of greens to save on dirty dishes. Efficiency!

My salad consisted of mixed greens, leftover chicken, yellow peppers, carrots, and Caesar yogurt dressing.

Tasty!

And now, since it's our two-year wedding anniversary, I have a wedding story to share with you... but not the very sentimental, mushy, mushy kind. It's the story that happens between all that soft, luscious love stuff on your wedding day. It's a funny and awkward story that still makes you laugh years later.

Our wedding kiss

Writing wedding recap posts about a month after Ryan and I exchanged vows allowed me to relive one of the best days of my life. I've broken down the recap to cover the most memorable and special moments of the day, but naturally many memories remain undocumented.

Like a memory of our wedding kiss.

You'd think looking back at our wedding kiss would evoke feelings of romance and love, but when Ryan and I think back on our wedding kiss, we laugh. And we laugh a lot.

A couple weeks after the wedding, Ryan and I were sitting on the couch talking about random memories from that special day.

Then, unexpectedly, Ryan said, “So, about our wedding kiss...”

I looked at him hesitantly and then started shaking.

"BY YOUR HANDS!!" I laughed. “What were you doing with your hands!? How have we not talked about this yet!?!? »

Ryan then started talking a mile a minute, explaining that during our ceremony he had been nervous and dizzy, so when our pastor said, “Now you can kiss the bride,” his mind was all over the place and he thought that should touch my face or something.

“But don’t you ever touch my face! I usually hug you around the neck, and your arms are almost always around my waist! " I said.

Why not use your wedding ceremony as a place to change that, you know?

His indecisiveness is almost visible in the photographs...

Ahhh!

Ryan and I look at all our wedding photos and smile, but we laugh when we look at our wedding kissing photos.

When we shared this story with our families, they assured us that no one knew that our kiss was anything unusual for us, but it turned into one of my favorite wedding memories because of what Ryan and I probably thought : “What the hell is going on!?!?” in one of the most romantic moments of our wedding ceremony.

Now, when a couple asks us for advice on their wedding day, we tell them to practice kissing on their wedding day!

Question of the day

What's the most awkward thing you've seen at a wedding?
If you're married, were there any awkward moments on your wedding day?

Protection from evil spirits and the evil eye

A wedding is a reason to envy for many people (especially for girls who have not been able to get married for a long time). Most often people envy those couples who glow with happiness and marry for love. Relatives diligently protect the newlyweds and wish only the best. In Rus', the custom arose of shouting “Bitter!” so that strangers would think that not everything is so smooth in the new family and there is nothing to envy. But after each scream you need to kiss to show that in fact the bride and groom are all right and they love each other.

Slavic ancestors were superstitious and tried to protect themselves from troubles through rituals and customs. They thought: evil spirits roam the world and look for happy people in order to ruin their mood or do some dirty tricks. Shouting “Bitter!” people announced that a wedding was not at all a joyful event for the newlyweds. It was believed that evil spirits would bypass the event and the newlyweds would not be in any danger.

A beautiful wedding kiss: what is it like?

Unlike caresses on the first wedding night, kisses at a wedding should not be so sensual; they do not have the goal of arousing each other. On the contrary: this action is more intended for human eyes and cameras. Therefore, do not try to show all your erotic skills, because a wedding is a holiday, not an orgy.

Newlyweds who have already passed this exam give 4 useful tips:

Do not poke into each other’s cheeks, so as not to flatten their noses (looks ugly in the photo).
Kiss without tongue, as the bride's makeup may smear.
Do light, long “smack-smack” sounds when the guests are actively shouting “bitterly.”
Kissing not only the lips, but also the hand, neck, cheek of the bride - such moments look touching and sweet in photos and videos.

Why do they shout “bitterly” at a wedding, count and then kiss?

If we start from simpler and more understandable reasons, we can also find several, each of which has the right to life. If you don’t really like the versions about the origin of the tradition, you should use other options:

Parents of newlyweds feel bitterness because their children have grown up and are leaving for independent lives.
The young people regretted that they would not be able to have fun, since this was the lot of single people. Married people led a measured life and did not participate in many of the amusements of that time.
It was believed that these were the last bitter minutes before many years of happy family life. Therefore, it was necessary to leave everything bad on this day.

As for the count, originally it meant how many years the bride and groom would live in a happy marriage. It was necessary to kiss as long as possible. Guests count “bitterly” after each one, but previously they did this once.

For your information!

They counted up to ten, and then went by tens, and then by hundreds.

Wedding How “kissing the bride” became a wedding custom [ARTICLE]

It's a practice you'll see at so many weddings, okay, but where did it come from and why was it necessary in the first place.

Kiss the Bride: A Brief History

According to several sources, this happened during the reign of the Roman Empire [from 753 BC. to 27 BC, and then from 64 to 1453 AD], it is believed that the bride and groom would not kiss each other before the wedding.

The kiss after exchanging vows is traditionally considered their first kiss.

Another reason why kissing after vows became common was because marriages were seen as contracts, and during the Roman Empire, kisses were the legal bond that sealed all contracts.

So, the couple will kiss as a seal to the marriage contract they have entered into.

Versions of why they shout “Bitter!” at the wedding

Linguistic version. In ancient times, weddings took place in late autumn or winter, because the harvest season was ending and people had time to walk and have fun. The groom, while ransoming the bride, had to climb up a high slippery slide to the bride and kiss her, and the cry “Slide!” was like the modern “March!” Over time, the slide became bitter, and the tradition of the newlyweds kissing after these words remains to this day.
Mystical version. For a long time, people, surrounding themselves with amulets, saved themselves from evil spirits, which were always ready to annoy. A cheerful wedding with numerous guests was considered the most vulnerable, so the guests, deceiving evil spirits, shouted “Bitter!” so that evil spirits would not visit the holiday.
World version. Kissing amid screams, the newlyweds show their guests how they are going to cope with life's squabbles and difficulties. According to the same version, a person shouting “Bitter!” takes away some of the sorrows and takes on some of the newlyweds' problems.
The version is sad. Since ancient times, after the wedding, the bride moved to her husband’s house and, sometimes, could not even communicate with her parents for the first two seasons. The tradition saddened and upset the girl, which fully conveys the meaning of the word bitterly.
Unusual version. There is a belief that at one wedding a guest, after a toast, drank a glass and cried bitterly, which means it’s not tasty. Having tried the drink, the other guests were also convinced that the drink was worthless, and in order to appease the guests, the newlyweds began to kiss.

Many people are interested in why they count when they shout “Bitter!” According to tradition, when the newlyweds kiss, they count down the years of family life; the more, the better.

Where did the tradition of shouting “bitter” come from?

How did it happen that people shout “Bitter” at weddings? Historians have different opinions on this matter . According to one version, this tradition originates from a folk game at a wedding. For the festivities, an ice slide was built, along which the groom had to climb to the bride standing at the top of the slide. Such a custom signified the strength of the young man’s feelings for his betrothed. At the same time, the guests shouted “slide”, hence the shouting.

According to another version, with such a cry the guests drove away evil spirits and evil spirits, trying to deceive them by shouting: “bitter”

Another version comes from the custom of giving a girl as a wife against her will, without asking her opinion. The girl cried all night before her marriage . Hence the tradition of saying “bitter”, expressing bitterness from an unwanted union.

It is now generally accepted that the bitterness of vodka, as the main table drink, should be drowned out by the sweetness of the newlyweds’ kiss.

Why do they count at a wedding when young people kiss: according to the superstition, in this way the guests count down the number of years that the spouses will live together.

Wedding preparations

The traditions and customs of the Armenian people require a number of mandatory events to be held before celebrating a wedding.

The first obligatory ritual is the bride's viewing.
It is held with the purpose that the newlyweds have the opportunity to see each other before the wedding. To do this, the future groom and his close relative make a visit to the bride’s house, while treating the girl’s mother or sisters to sweets. Every other day, sweets are distributed to neighboring children. To ensure that the celebration takes place in an organized manner, a ritual called “kyasum trel” is performed.
During it, the groom and the groom's father negotiate all the expenses for the holiday, the number of people, the menu, etc. Next comes the stage of active preparation, which includes, first of all, an agreement on the date of the wedding in the church. Issues regarding the number of guests are also discussed. The venue for the celebration is selected and the wedding program is drawn up.

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What types of kisses are there at weddings?

What types of kisses are there at a wedding? Surely most people know that if they shout “bitterly” - the newlyweds are kissing, “sweetly” - the parents of the newlyweds, “sourly” - the witnesses.

Kissing at a wedding

But besides this, there are other funny types of wedding smacks :

Gypsy style : the groom kisses the bride’s hand, going up to the neck and kissing on the lips, going down to the other hand.
Cossack style : the groom saddles a “stallion”, whose role is played by a witness, and gallops to his beloved. The “faithful horse” can be fed with green onions or dill.
“Between the Legs” : the newlyweds kiss through the two legs of wedding wine glasses, no vulgarity.
Birch tree : the bride, standing on a chair, leans towards the groom like a birch tree and kisses her betrothed.
Through a stump or woodpile : witnesses depict a stump, and the newlyweds seal their feelings through it with a kiss.
Like doves : the young rub noses and coo like doves.
Medically : kiss through a veil or handkerchief.
Below the waist : The groom kisses the bride while holding the best man's belt over his head.
Herringbone : the bride stands in a herringbone pattern, spreading her arms and fingers to the sides, and the groom kisses her alternately on both hands, rising higher.
Around the corner : young people secretly kiss, the task of witnesses is to notice this and loudly and jokingly condemn them for their shamelessness.
In French : young people send each other an airy kiss.
Cosmically : the groom’s friends throw him up, the bride’s task is to catch her beloved in flight.

There are other cool kisses for a wedding that the toastmaster can suggest, giving a playful task to the newlyweds .

Playful tasks for newlyweds at their wedding

How to avoid a kiss while shouting “Bitter”?

to give up kissing in a playful manner , especially when cheerful guests challenge the young people by shouting “bitterly” after each drink.

There are several original ways:

Each time after shouting “bitter,” the newlyweds raise a special sign with the inscription: “Newlyweds kissing” or “Bitterly? Kiss your neighbor." It is important that the font on the sign is large.
According to a similar principle, after shouting, a witness runs in front of the newlyweds’ table with a sign “The newlyweds are kissing.”
Young people can introduce a fee for each smack.
After the “bitter”, the newlyweds ask some couple among the guests to show an example of how it should be done.
Come up with gifts in exchange for a kiss and give them to everyone who wants them.

You can come up with other ways to get out of the obligation to kiss , the host can help with this by focusing the attention of the guests on competitions and other entertainment.

Why at a wedding, when the newlyweds kiss, they think

As for the reasons, there are much fewer versions than about the kiss itself, accompanied by cries of “bitter.” There are few explanations, they are all related to future family life. Some appeared a long time ago, but one appeared relatively recently:

It was believed that the longer the bride and groom kiss, the more happy years of family life they will have. In some regions they simply count, while in others after ten there are twenty, thirty, and so on.
Sometimes the counting is slow to determine how many children a couple will have. The newlyweds just need to stop at the desired number or take it as a joke.
The newest version is how many seconds the kiss will last, how many square meters will be in the apartment or house. It is partly comic, but at the same time it has spread widely among people.

There is no need to count during each kiss, as this drags out the wedding too much and quickly gets boring for the newlyweds. There are no rules or speed limits; you can do it fast or slow. Usually everyone does this together, and after finishing they applaud.

Details

About types of kisses

There are two types of kiss:

Passionate, swift, kiss in motion. When the future spouse pulls his beloved close to him and kisses her deeply, or when she impulsively rushes towards him and falls into his arms, and then a kiss follows. In order for the photographer to capture this action, he needs more space, that is, he is some distance from you. At the same time, your faces will not be visible in close-up and you can be calm about your facial expressions during the kiss. Just control your movements, do everything smoothly and gently, don’t engulf each other with your lips, this is certainly not for a photo shoot.

The kiss after the wedding registration refers specifically to this type - an action in motion. He is very touching to those around him and evokes certain enthusiastic emotions, and sometimes tears. Everyone who is close to the couple in love loves to photograph these kisses. As a rule, this is a photo against the backdrop of a flower arch. So kiss your health and get high.

Romantic kiss. The photographer takes it while being at a minimum distance from you. This often causes awkwardness and embarrassment, and lovers behave as if they had recently met. There is absolutely no tenderness and touching, there is only stiffness. There are, of course, other extremes when newlyweds demonstrate all the passion they are capable of. Neither one nor the other is correct. Leave all your passionate biting and deep kisses using your tongue until your wedding night, or other nights of which you will have many more. A romantic kiss is a mini-performance. The girl touches her lover’s cheek or neck with her palm and gently pulls him in. The young man gently touches her chin with his fingers or touches her cheek. A girl’s hands on a man’s face add romance to the photograph, while a man’s hands represent passion.

The most intriguing and intimate photographs are those in which the lips are not joined in a kiss, there is minimal space between them. A feeling of complete harmony is created, it seems that everything around has frozen in anticipation of a delightful moment.

If you do demonstrate a kiss, it should be light and airy; you should not press your faces together in a fit of passion. At the same time, your eyes should be closed; such pictures look incredibly romantic.

Wedding signs

When the newlyweds step on the carpet leading to the altar, it is worth paying attention to who stepped first. The first person to step is the head of the future family.
The dress, veil and ring are not allowed to be tried on by anyone, in order to avoid quarrels in the family.
Newlyweds should not eat from the same utensil, otherwise they will become dissatisfied with each other.
A groom who sees a dress before the wedding will bring problems to the house.
The bride wears only white underwear, as a symbol of purity and good intentions.

The bride should not look in the mirror while fully dressed before the wedding; let her look in the mirror, for example, without gloves.
If the bride turns her heel on a holiday, this is fraught with problems in family life.
The newlywed's shoes should be old (or worn for a day) and closed.
Smooth, simple wedding rings symbolize a smooth and calm family life for the newlyweds.

Rings for a wedding should be new and not melted down, so as not to bring other people’s difficulties into family life.
To attract happiness to the house, the groom buys rings for himself and his future wife.
Losing an engagement ring means separation, but letting it try it on means entrusting your fate to strangers.
Bad weather, rain and snow on your wedding day symbolize great family happiness.
On the wedding day, the newlywed should cry a little so as not to cry in marriage.
The coin in the bride’s shoe is a symbol of future prosperity.
The bride must ensure that none of her friends comes between her and the mirror, causing her husband's infidelity.