An important event in the life of every couple is marriage - the union of two destinies into one! Some Belarusian newlyweds do not stop at concluding a union at the legislative level in the registry office or at the field registration of marriage, but ask for God’s blessing to undergo the sacred wedding ceremony, uniting their hearts together forever.
- Church wedding ceremony
If you also want to sanctify your marriage with this unique church sacrament, but do not know what is needed to get married, then the MyWed.by portal is ready to figure out this important issue with you!
Preparation and Frequently Asked Questions
To perform the Sacrament of Wedding you must have:
- icon of the Savior;
- icon of the Mother of God;
- wedding rings;
- wedding candles (sold in the temple);
- a white towel (a towel for laying under your feet).
How does a church wedding take place?
There is a certain wedding ceremony that is performed on those who wish to get married. It roughly consists of three parts. The first is engagement. The second is the wedding, that is, in fact, what happens in the church. And the last thing is the meal, also an important part of the wedding, a feast where the newlyweds share the joy of marriage with everyone who was invited.
The Sacrament of Marriage is not possible if:
- blood or spiritual relationship* of the bride and groom;
- professing by one of the spouses a non-Christian religion;
- getting married more than the third time.
Also, obstacles to performing the Sacrament of Marriage are:
- denial of Orthodoxy (one of the spouses calls himself an atheist);
- stay of one of those wishing to get married to another person;
- a vow of celibacy, given earlier during monastic tonsure by one of those wishing to get married.
* spiritual kinship - the godfather of her child cannot marry a woman, and the godmother of his child cannot marry a man.
How to order a wedding in a temple?
To order a wedding in a church, you need to approach the priest in advance and discuss the day on which you would like to get married. You can’t get married on any day of the church year - there are certain days when people don’t get married in churches. These are fast days; Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday during the week.
The priest will also tell you about the traditions of the particular temple where you came. It is necessary to arrange a personal conversation with the priest in advance.
How to confess before the wedding?
Confession before the wedding is the same as any other. It must be deep, comprehensive and sincere. Approach it with the same responsibility and faith as you usually do.
How to choose a church for a wedding?
According to tradition, they get married in their own parishes. A wedding is a Sacrament in which your entire parish participates, in which everyone who usually prays with you at the Liturgy and shares communion with you from the same Chalice rejoices.
You can get married in the parish of the bride or groom - at the choice of the couple. But the now fashionable tradition of going to get married somewhere, for example, in Cyprus, is purely secular.
How to dissolve a wedding?
The wedding cannot be annulled. You can receive a blessing for remarriage, for a second wedding. But the first is not dissolved and does not lose its power as a Sacrament. There is no such thing as “debunking”.
This is a tragedy for people, this is a tragedy for the Church, when a family suddenly ceases to be one whole. We all understand that in life there are completely different circumstances, sometimes unpredictable. It happens that a family breaks up and a married marriage breaks up. Therefore, such a phenomenon as “removing a church blessing” has appeared in church practice. This is a procedure that gives people the right to remarry. But the second wedding is different from the first.
Is it possible to get married a second or third time?
The Church allows such a wedding only with the deep blessing of the ruling bishop of the area where the couple is going to get married.
The blessing can be obtained if you provide convincing arguments to the ruling bishop.
Is it possible to get married before the wedding, that is, before registering the marriage at the registry office?
In modern practice, the wedding takes place after the state registration of the marriage. If a person cannot take legal responsibility for another person - in the face of the state, in the face of society, then what kind of spiritual responsibility can we talk about?
How much does a church wedding cost?
The wedding ceremony, both in the Orthodox and Catholic churches, is paid. And although some churches have a price list for services, no one has set the exact price. In each individual case, the issue is resolved individually . The cost depends on the pomp of the ceremony. If you want the ceremony to be accompanied by a choir of singers and church bells to ring, then the price will be correspondingly higher. In principle, you can get married for free: for a regular ceremony, some churches do not charge a fee at all, but only voluntary donations, the size of which depends on your capabilities. In 2022, the price of a wedding in Russia ranges from 2,000 to 10,000 rubles and depends on the location of the temple and its significance.
The meaning of the Sacrament
Love between a man and a woman is one of the important themes of biblical evangelism. As God Himself says in the Book of Genesis, “A man will leave his father and his mother and cleave to his wife; and the two will become one flesh” (Gen. 2:24). It is important to note that marriage was established by God in paradise, that is, it is not a consequence of the Fall. The Bible tells of married couples who had a special blessing from God, expressed in the multiplication of their offspring: Abraham and Sarah, Isaac and Rebecca, Jacob and Rachel. Love is glorified in the Song of Solomon - a book that, despite all the allegorical and mystical interpretations of the Holy Fathers, does not lose its literal meaning.
The first miracle of Christ was the transformation of water into wine at a marriage in Cana of Galilee, which is understood by patristic tradition as a blessing of the marriage union: “We affirm,” says St. Cyril of Alexandria, “that He (Christ) blessed marriage in accordance with the economy by which He became man and went... to the wedding feast in Cana of Galilee (John 2:1-11).”
History knows of sects (Montanism, Manichaeism, etc.) that rejected marriage as supposedly contrary to the ascetic ideals of Christianity. Even in our time, we sometimes hear the opinion that Christianity abhors marriage and “allows” the marriage union of a man and a woman only out of “condescension for the infirmities of the flesh.” How wrong this is can be judged by at least the following statements of the holy martyr Methodius of Patara (IV century), who, in his treatise on virginity, gives a theological justification for childbirth as a consequence of marriage: “... It is necessary that man... act in the image of God... for it is said : “Be fruitful and multiply” (Gen. 1:28). And we should not disdain the definition of the Creator, as a result of which we ourselves began to exist. The beginning of the birth of people is the immersion of a seed into the bowels of a woman’s womb, so that bone from bone and flesh from flesh, having been received by an invisible force, are again formed into another person by the same Artist... This, perhaps, is indicated by the sleepy frenzy induced on the primordial ( cf. Gen. 2:21), prefiguring the pleasure of a husband during communication (with his wife), when, in the thirst for childbirth, he goes into a frenzy (ekstasis - “ecstasy”), relaxing with the soporific pleasures of childbirth, so that something rejected from his bones and flesh, formed again... into another person... Therefore, it is rightly said that a person leaves his father and mother, as if he suddenly forgets about everything at the time when he, united with his wife in the embrace of love, becomes a participant in fruitfulness, allowing the Divine Creator to take a rib from him in order to the son to become the father himself. So, if even now God forms man, is it not impudent to avert procreation, which the Almighty Himself is not ashamed to perform with His clean hands?” As St. Methodius further states, when men “cast semen into the natural female passages,” it becomes “participated in the divine creative power.”
Thus, marital communication is viewed as a divinely ordained creative action performed “in the image of God.” Moreover, sexual intercourse is the way in which God the Artist creates. Although such thoughts are rare among the Fathers of the Church (who were almost all monks and therefore had little interest in such topics), they cannot be passed over in silence when presenting the Christian understanding of marriage. Condemning “carnal lust,” hedonism, which leads to sexual immorality and unnatural vices (cf. Rom. 1:26–27; 1 Cor. 6, etc.), Christianity blesses sexual intercourse between a man and a woman within the framework of marriage.
In marriage, a person undergoes transformation, overcomes loneliness and isolation, expands, replenishes and completes his personality. Archpriest John Meyendorff defines the essence of Christian marriage this way: “A Christian is called - already in this world - to have the experience of a new life, to become a citizen of the Kingdom; and this is possible for him in marriage. Thus, marriage ceases to be just a satisfaction of temporary natural impulses. Marriage is the unique union of two beings in love, two beings who can transcend their own human nature and be united not only “to each other” but also “in Christ.”
Another outstanding Russian pastor, priest Alexander Elchaninov, speaks of marriage as a “dedication”, a “mystery” in which there is “a complete change in a person, an expansion of his personality, new eyes, a new sense of life, birth through him into the world in a new fullness.” In the union of love between two people, there is both a revelation of the personality of each of them, and the emergence of the fruit of love - a child, turning a two into a trinity: “... In marriage, complete knowledge of a person is possible - a miracle of sensation, touch, vision of someone else's personality... Before marriage, a person glides above life , observes it from the side, and only in marriage does it plunge into life, entering it through another person. This enjoyment of real knowledge and real life gives that feeling of completeness and satisfaction that makes us richer and wiser. And this fullness deepens even more with the emergence from us, merged and reconciled, of the third, our child.”
Attaching such exceptionally high importance to marriage, the Church has a negative attitude towards divorce, as well as second or third marriage, unless the latter are caused by special circumstances, such as, for example, a violation of marital fidelity by one or the other party. This attitude is based on the teaching of Christ, who did not recognize the Old Testament regulations regarding divorce (cf. Matt. 19:7-9; Mark 10:11-12; Luke 16:18), with one exception - divorce for “fornication” (Matt. 5:32). In the latter case, as well as in the event of the death of one of the spouses or in other exceptional cases, the Church blesses the second and third marriage.
In the early Christian Church there was no special wedding rite: the husband and wife came to the bishop and received his blessing, after which the two of them received communion at the Liturgy of the Holy Mysteries of Christ. This connection with the Eucharist can also be traced in the modern rite of the Sacrament of Marriage, which begins with the liturgical exclamation “Blessed is the Kingdom” and includes many prayers from the rite of the Liturgy, the reading of the Apostle and the Gospel, and a symbolic common cup of wine.
The wedding is preceded by an engagement ceremony, during which the bride and groom must testify to the voluntary nature of their marriage and exchange rings.
The wedding itself takes place in the church, usually after the Liturgy. During the sacrament, those getting married are given crowns, which are a symbol of the kingdom: each family is a small church. But the crown is also a symbol of martyrdom, because marriage is not only the joy of the first months after the wedding, but also the joint bearing of all subsequent sorrows and suffering - that daily cross, the weight of which in marriage falls on two. In an age when the disintegration of the family has become commonplace and at the first difficulties and trials spouses are ready to betray each other and break their union, this laying of martyr's crowns serves as a reminder that a marriage will only be lasting when it is not based on the immediate and fleeting passion, but on the willingness to give his life for another. And a family is a house built on a solid foundation, and not on sand, only if Christ Himself becomes its cornerstone. The troparion “Holy Martyr,” which is sung during the three-time circumambulation of the bride and groom around the lectern, also reminds us of suffering and the cross.
During the wedding, the Gospel story about the marriage in Cana of Galilee is read. This reading emphasizes the invisible presence of Christ at every Christian marriage and God’s blessing of the marriage union. In marriage, the miracle of the transfusion of “water” must take place, i.e. everyday life on earth, in “wine” - a feast of love from one person to another.
What do the professionals offer?
There are highly specialized wedding specialists: only a makeup artist, only a photographer, only a musician. And then there are coordinators and organizers, they help with advice and deeds, take care of all the issues so that the newlyweds, their parents and guests don’t think about anything at all, but enjoy the event.
Therefore, it is easier to find out not the total cost of the wedding, but the price range for each service.
- A wedding photographer will cost from 150 rubles or slightly more with a minimum amount of work and photos from the registry office and studio; if you add to this filming the trip, the first dance and something else, it will cost at least 350 rubles. ; Registration in the photo of the entire holiday and preparation for it will cost about 600 rubles . It may be more expensive, but finding a photographer for 50 rubles. now it is unlikely to succeed.
- Prices for video filming also vary: minimum from the registry office and walks - from 250 rubles. ; if you add the beginning of the celebration, the dance of the newlyweds and the preparation of the video - from 400 rubles. , the whole holiday and film - from 600 rubles .
- Presenter services cost from 300 rubles. if he works alone; with the involvement of other creative workers - from 600 rubles. , extended program - from 800 rubles . Of course, everything is individual.
- For the design and decoration of the wedding hall they charge 400-800 rubles. But these are rather average-minimum prices for standard options.
- Renting a car in Minsk costs from 75-80 rubles. for 1 hour , but the longer, the cheaper in terms of time; a minibus and a jeep will cost about 15-25 rubles. more expensive , a limousine – about 120-150 rubles. in 1 hour .
The photo is for illustrative purposes, source: pixabay.com
We don’t mention prices for renting premises, everything here varies much more. You can look for a canteen at a school or a factory, you can look for a restaurant that is closed for special services, or you can look for a country club or an estate. By the way, it’s easier now; they say that last year’s ban on holidays was not lifted, but forgotten. In 2020, this was very disruptive.
