“Therefore, what God has joined together, let no man put asunder,” says the Gospel (Mark 10:9). However, reality is far from God's plan. Divorce, alas, has become commonplace, although in reality it is a huge tragedy.
If you think about the biblical text, the answer to the question “how to debunk a church marriage” is obvious - no way. However, in some Christian churches, divorce, although not encouraged, is allowed. We will tell you in the article what to do after a divorce if the spouses were married.
Features of the procedure
Debunking means divorce with the permission of a clergyman. During the reign of the church, marriages were concluded only with the consent of the priests. They served as a modern registry office. Divorce was also given by priests. In this case, there must be compelling reasons for consummating the marriage, prescribed in the church charter. Until the spouses received a certificate of disunion, they could not marry or remarry.
Nowadays, the official body registering marriages is the registry office. Divorce also occurs at the request of one of the spouses or both. Despite this, the “habit” of getting married in church remains, which means that you also need to get debunked in the event of a divorce. On the one hand, this is how it should be, because people who begin to “play” according to the rules of Orthodoxy must fully adhere to them. However, there are really no consequences if the debunking procedure is not followed.
Many believers are sure that in the process of getting married in a church, God’s blessing on the marriage occurs, which means it will be happy. To be precise, God marries a couple at the moment when a woman and a man meet, and if you dig deeper, at the moment of birth. God created a couple for everyone and at a certain moment makes sure that the spouses meet.
In other words, you need to understand that church rules, public (registry office) and divine rules are three different things. Thus, if you decide to get married in a church, then you will need to go through the procedure of debunking.
How many weddings are allowed?
Explanations on this issue were given at the Council of Bishops of the Russian Orthodox Church, dedicated to the 100th anniversary of the restoration of the patriarchate, in December 2022 in Moscow.
The Church “does not encourage second marriage.” The maximum number of weddings for an Orthodox Christian is three. After the first divorce, the innocent spouse is allowed a second marriage. For others there are a number of conditions.
Restrictions for re-wedding:
- Penance is established by canonical rules for spouses who are guilty of the first divorce. It is imposed by a priest and is designed to help a person realize sin, sincerely repent, give strength to take the right path and hope for God's Grace.
- Permission for a third wedding is granted in exceptional cases. The period of penance increases.
- Marriage for the fourth time is not allowed.
- Married marriages and unmarried ones, but officially registered with the civil registry office, are taken into account. But only those into which a person entered after receiving the Sacrament of Baptism are taken into account.
Thus, even spouses who were previously debunked due to life circumstances can receive God’s Blessing of their marriage again.
Reasons
This is actually a formality. If a person wants to get a divorce, no one will forbid him to do so. Nowadays, the church has lost its status as the main body that registers marriage and dissolves it, so any person who turns to a priest on such an issue receives permission. But there are still rules.
Religious
The main document is the Bible, but only the Old Testament. The New says that spouses can never divorce. There is no such thing as debunking. This refers to Christ and his bride - faith. These are two indivisible concepts. However, if you transfer everything to people, it turns out that after marriage no one can get a divorce.
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The only reason given in the Old Testament for the dissolution of a marriage is adultery. There are many more of them in church canons.
Grounds for debunking according to Orthodoxy
Spouses can divorce by consent or unilaterally.
Consent of both parties
Spouses who have decided to dissolve their family relationship come to church and declare their desire. They explain the reason and talk about the current situation. Then they go through a certain procedure and receive a confirmation document about the debunking.
Unilaterally
According to church canons, a husband or wife must declare their desire to the priest and present documents on the basis of which the marriage is dissolved unilaterally. In the old days this is how it was done. Nowadays, you can choose a suitable reason for each case; documents are provided if available. If there is no documentary evidence, they refer to the person’s words. Church documents state the following:
- An abortion performed by a woman without the knowledge of her husband, except in cases where the surgical intervention was carried out for medical reasons.
- Proven infidelity of the husband or wife.
- Venereal disease, AIDS.
- Unhealthy addiction - drug addiction, gambling, alcoholism.
- Recognition of the spouse as incompetent, presence of mental illness.
- Renunciation of Orthodoxy, change of religion.
- Re-marrying after an official divorce in the registry office.
- Committing a crime followed by imprisonment. There is an amendment here - by court decision. But what if the spouse committed a crime and the court found him innocent? This happens often in our world.
- Absence of a legal spouse for 5 years. There is evidence.
- Attempt to commit suicide.
- Childlessness.
- Incest.
- Bigamy.
- Marriage against will.
- Death of a husband or wife.
Thus, anyone can get debunked.
Divorce rate
In fact, there is no exact answer to this question. If you are guided by the rules of Orthodoxy, all couples can get divorced if there are the grounds indicated above. If the remarriage turns out to be unsuccessful, you can get a divorce in the registry office and the church, and then enter into it again with another person. The main condition for termination is the presence of compelling reasons specified in the charter.
At the same time, the Bible says the following: “Whoever marries a divorced person commits adultery, which means he commits a sin.” Thus, there can be no re-wedding. But few people pay attention to this statement.
Does the modern church recognize debunking?
It is illogical to even say that the breakup of a Christian couple, especially if children are already growing up in it, is blessed by the church; this is a purely human decision.
Jesus, who lived as a man, saw with his own eyes the lustful human soul, left only one condition for ending the relationship between husband and wife - adultery.
The sacrament of marriage is a covenant of love signed by God Himself. A marriage relationship can be broken only after the fact of adultery has been established. At the same time, it is clearly stated that entering into an alliance with people who have committed adultery means covering oneself with the sin of fornication. (Matthew 19:9)
The Church union is based on the relationship between the groom Jesus and the bride of the Church.
Christ and the Bride Church
The church can change the groom, but it will no longer be Orthodoxy. When the Antichrist rises at the head of the church under the guise of God, the end of the world will come.
Important! The sacrament of wedding emphasizes that the new family becomes a small church, a part of the Bride of Christ. The main task of the modern Church is to lead people to salvation, and every Orthodox cell should help it in this.
The unifying feature of the Bride and Jesus is the Divine love of people for the Creator of the world and among themselves.
Reasons for refusal
During the reign of the church, everyone who did not present false information and did not have evidence of their words was refused. Failures are extremely rare these days. If supporting documents are available, they are provided; if they are absent, they are not. Priests are guided by the statement of the husband or wife. No one checks the veracity of the words. In this case, only one rule applies - morality. If a person gets debunked and at the same time lies, it would be better if he did not go to church at all, and continued to live according to his own rules and laws.
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What to do with a wedding ring
Despite the divorce and debunking, there are several points regarding the wedding ring.
Firstly, there are many signs associated with the loss of the first wedding ring, promising negative consequences and troubles for all family relatives, even death.
Secondly, it is recommended that in any case, regardless of the presence of repeated marriages, the wedding ring should be removed and hidden at home, but not thrown away or lost.
Thirdly, if there is no remarriage or wedding, then it is allowed to wear a wedding ring. This does not promise any troubles or sins.
Progress of the event
Ideally, the spouses or one of them should go to the church where the wedding ceremony took place. If this is not possible, go to any Orthodox church. Initially, there is a conversation with the priest. A person talks about his marriage, indicates the reason for this decision. Next, a statement is written. The date of the wedding, the nuances of living together, and the reasons for divorce are indicated. Relevant documents are attached.
A package of documents is sent to a higher authority. Then you need to wait for permission.
Required Documentation
It is mandatory to write a statement indicating the nuances of family life and the reasons for divorce. If you have a wedding certificate, this document is provided. If it is not there, the date and place of the event are simply indicated.
Attached are documents that confirm the applicant’s words (their list depends on the specific case):
- Death certificate of husband, wife.
- Certificate recognizing the spouse as incompetent or mentally ill.
- A document confirming that the spouse has committed a crime.
- Certificate of sexually transmitted disease, AIDS.
- Absence of a legal spouse for 5 years.
In this case, the amendment “if any” is always given. If there are no documents, the applicant’s words are referred to. It is especially interesting what supporting documentation to bring in case of betrayal.
Preparation
No preparatory procedures are required. If it is possible to obtain supporting documentation, you should obtain it. Then you should go to church to write a statement. In other situations, they simply go to the temple.
Ceremony in the church
The debunking procedure does not require a special ceremony. You just write an application and expect the result. The final dethronement occurs at the conclusion of the next church marriage.
Stages
Let's look at the rules of debunking in the Orthodox Church and the sequence of actions:
- Collect the necessary documents described in the previous paragraph.
- Submit a petition to the diocese addressed to the bishop. The form should be checked in the specific church at the place of application.
- Have an interview with a priest. It should indicate all the reasons for the debunking.
- Go through the wedding process again (if desired).
The procedure is simple, but very time-consuming. It can take from 3 months to a year. This depends on the working conditions and workload of the diocese.
Is it possible to get married again?
Repeatedly performing this ritual is one of the options for debunking your ex-spouse. However, in this case, you will need to apply for the blessing of the Diocese.
During the conversation, you need to convince the clergyman of the seriousness of your intentions and the balance of the decision made. A second wedding is approved for the spouse who was not to blame for the breakup of the previous marriage.
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