Meeting of young people from the registry office: how the ceremony is carried out and what to say
Today we have an article on the topic: “How to meet the groom’s parents from the registry office and what to say?” Children grow up quickly. It seems like just yesterday that the son was learning to take his first steps, and today he declares that he has met the girl of his dreams and is going to marry her. And parents are faced with many questions about organizing a wedding celebration, an important part of which is the ritual of welcoming and blessing the newlyweds after the registry office.
A beautiful tradition filled with deep meaning of meeting newlyweds after the registry office has survived to this day. Over time, it partially changed, many symbolic components disappeared, but the significance of meeting and blessing one’s children remained in their new status - husband and wife.
A special ritual in which parents bid farewell to a new family for a happy life is organically woven into the wedding ceremony. It goes differently in every family. Some people pay more attention to the ritual of sharing bread, while others combine it with blessing the newlyweds with an icon of revered saints.
What are the rules for greeting young people with a loaf of bread?
Wedding ceremony - meeting of the newlyweds with a loaf of bread.
A person celebrates the most joyful and significant events in his life in the circle of his closest and dearest people. In this way we share our happiness and good fortune with our dear loved ones and friends. A wedding celebration combines several emotions:
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- the joy of creating a new family;
- state of holiday;
- the beauty and originality of traditions and rituals inherent in the birth of the union of two loving hearts.
By observing the centuries-old customs of our ancestors , we thereby pay tribute to our rich history.
Honoring certain traditions, newlyweds must understand the deep meaning that the tradition conveys, the symbolism that can ensure the well-being of a young family .
In order for the ceremony to most accurately comply with the old canons and to be carried out correctly, it is necessary to consult with the clergyman of the temple where the wedding ceremony was held
What do you need to meet young people?
While the young married couple, after the wedding, tours interesting pre-selected places, the invitees arrive at the banquet hall. The first people to greet and congratulate the newly-made husband and wife will be their parents.
To meet the newlyweds you need:
- loaf;
- salt shaker;
- towel and more than one;
- icon;
- champagne and glasses.
Today, you can buy a loaf ready-made or order it in a cafe or pastry shop.
Previously, baking wedding cakes was entrusted to a woman who was married and necessarily lived in a happy marriage. While kneading the dough and putting out the dough, she sang songs about family happiness, prosperity, and the love of spouses. Giving it a round shape, prayers were read.
This way the bread was saturated with positive energy. The loaf was baked with three tiers. The top layer was intended for the newlyweds, the middle layer was used to treat guests, and the lower part (in ancient times coins were baked there) was given to musicians. The decorations of the loaf also had a special meaning, and each element meant something desired:
- spikelets - family wealth;
- swans, doves - marital fidelity;
- grapes - healthy offspring and good luck in business;
- braids - the interweaving of the destinies of the bride and groom;
- roses - love.
The towel also carried a sacred meaning. During the rituals, the wedding towel acted as a talisman . The patterns embroidered by the skillful hands of the craftswoman gave it such a magical meaning.
The girl herself had to prepare towels for her wedding, depicting symbols that would attract love, prosperity, and happiness. By giving the work into unfamiliar hands, the bride risked introducing other people's thoughts and wishes, not always kind, into her future married life.
towels at the wedding :
- on one the bride and groom stood during the ceremony ,
- on the other, parents brought out a festive loaf ,
- and the third tied one hand together, as if symbolizing the unity of the spouses.
Meeting the newlyweds after registration at the registry office?
The newlyweds can be blessed for a new life immediately after registration or an outdoor ceremony. Often the ceremony is held right on the steps of the Wedding Palace.
Confetti fireworks
The meeting after the registry office with confetti fireworks will leave a bright mark in the memory of the newlyweds and guests. Standing on both sides of the path along which the young couple walks, guests and relatives shower them with clouds of multi-colored circles.
The type of confetti can be absolutely any. The main rule is that they must correspond to the style of the holiday. For example, these could be New Year's crackers, sparkling circles cut out of foil, depicting snow. Absolutely any shape of products is acceptable, from a traditional circle to creative cars, hearts and butterflies.
Parade procession
You can meet newlyweds after the registry office in various ways:
- distribute flags to guests. Products can be of various shapes and sizes, with images, photographs, inscriptions, coats of arms;
- provide the assembled guests with colored satin ribbons attached to long sticks.
Waving accessories and shouting out good wishes, those present will ensure a bright, memorable meeting for the newlyweds.
Showering petals and leaves
Showering young spouses with rose or lavender petals is a custom whose roots go back centuries. The ceremony is full of romance and incredibly beautiful. Guests and relatives lined up in two lines shower the solemnly marching couple with clouds of soft white, burgundy or lilac petals. Touching photo and video footage of the ceremony will be an excellent addition to the family archive.
If the wedding is being held in the fall, flower petals can be replaced with bright leaves of various shades.
Meeting with Swords
Swords are a symbol of protection and courage. For a romantic wedding in an old or fantasy style, the scenario of the newlyweds meeting with blades is perfect. Guests and relatives line up in two lines, forming a corridor along which the newlyweds must pass. And swords or sabers are crossed over their heads. Such a ceremony is incredibly spectacular, full of hidden meaning.
Banners
Guests can prepare a pleasant surprise for the newlyweds: draw or order posters and banners with touching inscriptions, hearts, and well wishes. The invitees hold the paper by the corners, and the spouses must break through the obstacle.
showering with rice
The tradition of showering the newlyweds with rice, wheat or other grains is present in the wedding customs of many nations. Thus, the guests wish the newlyweds a prosperous, well-fed life, many children and good health. It is worth listening to the wisdom of your ancestors, and not regretting a few cups of cereal, giving the spouses a surprise at the exit from the registry office.
Air balloons
Balloons have long become an invariable feature of any celebration. A wedding cannot be complete without these colorful, lightweight items. To meet the newlyweds, you need to choose bright balloons with suitable designs and inscriptions. It is advisable to fill them with helium - in this case, the balloons are released into the sky, beautifully completing the ceremony.
Bubble
A meeting between spouses and soap bubbles is very romantic. It is enough to provide all those invited with bottles, and a magnificent, solemn procession of the newlyweds will be ensured through a cloud of weightless balls shimmering with all the colors of the rainbow.
Serpentine and pom-poms
For a meeting, you can use colored serpentine or fluffy pompoms. The constant attributes of noisy parties, twisted shiny ribbons, will perfectly set off the solemn procession of the newly-made spouses. And pom-poms floating in the air will provide chic, festive shots.
The meeting of the newlyweds after the wedding or registration is a classic attribute of wedding celebrations. Modern customs allow for many different options for carrying it out, from traditional bread and salt to creative scenarios. It is not difficult to choose exactly the meeting that will ideally fit into the overall idea of the celebration and will give the newlyweds and guests a lot of positive emotions.
How to meet newlyweds
And now the wedding procession is approaching. Previously, the wedding took place at the groom’s home (it was assumed that the young wife would now live in a new family), so the parents and invitees were waiting for them at the porch . Today, banquet halls of canteens, cafes and restaurants are more often chosen as wedding venues.
When the newlyweds meet, the guests form a living corridor . Small objects are also prepared in advance and sprinkled on the bride and groom, as if wishing them happiness in their family life.
Traditionally, flower petals are thrown up, and coins, rice, and candies are thrown at the feet so that the family journey is well-fed, prosperous and happy.
Each such item carries its own wish:
- millet and rice - healthy offspring;
- candy - sweet life;
- flower petals - happiness and love;
- coins - prosperity;
- hops - luck and health;
- nuts - a strong marriage.
Who holds the loaf
The newlyweds walk along a lively corridor, and guests with wishes of happiness and goodness sprinkle candy, change, and millet at their feet. Parents are standing at the entrance to the hall where the festive banquet will be held . The mother-in-law holds a loaf of bread on an embroidered towel, and the father-in-law holds an icon .
According to tradition, a young couple bows to the parents who gave them life. The newly-made husband and wife each separate a piece of loaf , dip them in salt and treat each other. The meaning of this action is that a couple in love has shared bread and salt , and now a happy life awaits them without quarrels and swearing .
At many modern weddings, the newlyweds should not break off, but bite off a loaf. Moreover, whose piece turns out to be larger will be the leader in the family.
After this, the loaf is either removed and the next day taken to church for donation , or all guests are treated to it. The bride and groom take turns carrying around all those invited, and everyone breaks off a piece, dips it in salt and wishes happiness to the newlyweds.
After the loaf, it’s the father-in-law’s turn. He can present his daughter-in-law with a certificate or a solemn letter stating that from this day on she is a member of their family.
the bride's parents come into action . The newly-made mother-in-law treats her daughter and son-in-law with honey and wishes them a long life and an endless honeymoon. And the father-in-law, the father of the bride , brings them champagne . The glasses are drained to the bottom and broken “for good luck .” According to tradition, young people can bandage their hands with a towel, which will symbolize their long journey together.
Presentation of a loaf
We welcome you with bread and salt and treat you in Russian!
Here it is, a fragrant bread with a crunchy twisted crust. The bread is amber, golden, as if filled with sunshine!
Specify, presentation of a loaf at a wedding, holiday, ceremony. If for a wedding, then here are two options:
Dear newlyweds! According to tradition, the people dearest to you - your parents - meet you here. Mom is holding a wedding loaf in her hands as a symbol of well-being and prosperity. Newlyweds! Break off a piece of bread and salt it properly! You have the opportunity to annoy each other for the last time. Yes, add more salt: Now exchange pieces of bread. Look at each other with tenderness and feed each other!
Dear newlyweds, your family ship is setting off on a long voyage and each of the guests present sincerely wishes you that your ship will not experience any storms or heavy winds, may the sun always shine above you, as warm and kind as this wedding loaf in the hands of your parents . Break off a piece and dip in honey so that your life is as sweet as honey and dip in butter (melted butter) so that the wife rolls around behind her husband like cheese in butter. Now feed each other because you will take care of each other.
If the loaf is presented at a wedding, then I can offer this option:
The most precious people in your life stand in front of you - your parents. Bow down to them three times from the white face to the mother earth. From the white of your face, may God grant you to meet them face to face for many years only with joy. And bow down to the ground so that God will give you long years of life. Dear __________ and __________, listen to the words of the holy blessing of your parents We greet you with bread and salt, We wish you to live in harmony. We welcome the bonding of your parental blessing. — Our people have a good old tradition: to greet dear people close to our hearts with bread and salt. Bread is a symbol of peace, life, prosperity, a symbol of great work. And people also say: to taste bread with a person on the road means to take an oath of allegiance and friendship. Keep this in mind when accepting your first family loaf. Try it! Well, let's see who will be the head of your family. Salt your pieces from the heart, sparing no salt... feed each other. May you annoy each other today for the first and last time in your life!
Life is given to us only once. and we must live it as positively as possible. So, LET'S SMILE!
If the loaf is not presented at a wedding, but when a delegation of guests meets from afar, you can briefly and succinctly:
Our good land is famous for its hospitality and cordiality! For guests there are Russian songs, And a fragrant loaf!
And naturally we hand over bread and salt and eat some toast.
Watch the presentation of wedding loaves in the Weddings topic. Rituals
Meeting the young with bread and salt.
There are not many large-scale and public events in our lives, and there are generally a limited number of such events as weddings. And it is quite reasonable to want this event and all its phases to be held at the highest level. A wedding is a separate step, separate emotions, separate obligations. Today, fewer and fewer couples want to get married traditionally, all rituals are becoming a thing of the past, and they are being replaced by weddings of a different kind. You can get married underwater and in the air, on black bikes or light green Cossacks with gypsies on the roof. The main thing is the idea. If a young couple does not want to have an eccentric show wedding, then there is only one option left - to turn to traditions.
Today we will talk about one important and fairly traditional procedure, which is called “meeting the newlyweds with bread and salt.” Regardless of what wedding format the newlyweds choose, parents and close relatives are always invited to the celebration
And it is the parents who meet the couple at the house with a loaf of bread. More and more often, the porch of the native monastery is happily replaced by the bright vaults of various cafes and restaurants. But one thing remains unchanged - bread and salt are served to the young by their parents.
Blessing of the Young
In the old days, there were no weddings without parental blessing. This simple ritual was very important, as it carried the wisdom of older generations and showed children’s respect for them. If the parents did not agree to a wedding in church, then the young couple, disobeying the ban, bore the heavy cross of renouncing their family all their lives. Their family relationships did not work out and they were often unhappy.
Blessing literally means “praise to the future.” Therefore, such a ritual is an encouragement for the choice of a bride or groom and a prerequisite for the happiness of a young family.
Before the registry office , parents will bless their children separately . The young family receives a second blessing after the wedding and before the wedding banquet. Traditionally, the icon of Christ the Savior or the icon of the Kazan Mother of God is used. She is also held on a special towel.
After parental parting words, the young people kiss the icon. But it would be more correct to first make the sign of the cross before doing this. Later the icon participating in the meeting of the bride and groom is handed over to the young family .
If the family is a believer and carefully observes family traditions, then it is best to talk with your spiritual mentor, who will tell you which icon to choose and how to properly bless the young.
What to tell the groom's parents
Parents, meeting a young couple, should bless them for many years of family life and wish them happiness and prosperity. The speech may consist of congratulations and parting words . Usually, the floor is given to the parents of the bride and groom in turn.
The blessing of parents can be in prose or in poetry . And the main words should be: “blessings,” “congratulations,” “advice and love . It is advisable to think over your speech in advance so that in a moment of great excitement you do not miss all the most important things.
The speech of the groom's parents should be a parting word on the path that the newlyweds will take together from now on . Wish the newlyweds a pure relationship, happiness, and understanding of each other . Give them your love and blessing, so that the bride and groom feel the support of their closest people at such an important moment.
History of appearance
In the old days in Rus', young people asked their parents for their wedding blessings. Blessing in this context meant approval for marriage and permission for a son to marry and a daughter to marry. Marriage without parental blessing was not approved by society and was considered unhappy.
In addition to moral support, the blessed young people also received material support for their marriage, in the form of a dowry, inheritance, titles and privileges. Moreover, this material component of parental blessing extended to the future offspring of the young, to their children.
Therefore, not a single wedding in Rus' was complete without such an important ritual. And the groom, without the approval of his parents, did not decide on either matchmaking or a wedding.
With the change in lifestyle, customs invariably change. Such changes also affected the ritual of parental blessing of a son before the wedding. Previously, the groom received it twice - before and after the wedding. Today, more and more often, young people limit themselves to one thing - a blessing with a loaf of bread on the threshold of the groom’s house (or in front of a restaurant , cafe , banquet hall ), before the wedding feast. And sometimes they completely miss this wedding stage.
Modern newlyweds are no longer so attached to popular beliefs. They are not afraid of the thought that without parental prayers their marriage will be doomed. Young people often live together before registration, without informing their parents and without asking their approval by submitting an application to the registry office .
However, this does not apply to all couples. And those who cannot imagine their marital union without a wedding in church also try to receive a parental blessing.
Blessing of young parents
As you know, the parental word in Christianity is endowed with special power. It is believed that the message that father and mother address to their children can have a direct impact on their future fate. That is why almost no wedding, both in ancient times and today, is complete without parental blessing. The meaning of this ritual is multifaceted: approval of this union, wishes of all the best and wise parting words to the young family.
How does the modern ceremony of blessing young parents take place?
At modern weddings, the blessing usually occurs when the newlyweds meet from the wedding walk before entering the banquet hall. The parents stand in front of the newlyweds with icons and a loaf of bread, make a short speech, after which the newlyweds kiss the icons, treat themselves to bread and salt, and then follow the instructions of the presenter. This is a simplified version of the ritual. If you follow the ancient canons, then the newlyweds are blessed twice - the first time the parents bless the bride and groom separately in their father's house (before leaving for the registry office), and the second time - jointly as described above.
What icons are used when blessing newlyweds?
Traditionally, the icon of the Mother of God (usually the Kazan icon) and the icon of Christ the Savior are used to bless the newlyweds.
Let's take a closer look at each of them. The Kazan Icon of the Mother of God is one of the most revered images of the Mother of God. She has long been considered the intercessor and patroness of our people; many miracles and amazing salvations are attributed to her. In 2011, this icon went to space! Patriarch Kirill of Moscow and All Rus', handing it over to the space agency, commented on this event: “May the Cover of the Most Pure Queen of Heaven extend over our troubled world, torn apart by contradictions, in which there is so much sorrow and human grief...” This icon is used to bless newlyweds at weddings. in the church. It is of particular importance for women. They pray to her for the birth of children and protection of the house from evil forces. It is with the icon of the Kazan Mother of God that the mother usually blesses her daughter before the wedding (this is done without prying eyes before the newlyweds go to the registry office). The icon “Savior Almighty” (or “Savior”) is the most common image of Christ. On it, Christ holds a book with a quotation from the Gospel with one hand, thereby pointing out the path of salvation, and with the other hand he blesses the person looking at him. This icon is prayed to in times of need and joy. She is asked for the well-being of family members. Previously, the icon of the Savior was the first to be brought into the newlyweds’ house. If the bride’s parents use the icon of the Mother of God to bless their daughter for a happy marriage, then the groom’s parents bless their son with the icon of the Savior. Nowadays, when newlyweds meet, both these icons and one of them are used. As an option, parents can purchase a wedding couple or a fold - these are two icons connected together. You can buy these icons in any of the many church shops in Voronezh.
Which parent holds the icons and loaf of bread during the blessing?
How to distribute roles among themselves, who holds what, who addresses the newlyweds first? These questions usually arise among anxious parents when preparing for the ceremony. As practice shows, there is no single template; these are nuances that can be played out differently at each wedding. Let's look at several options (from left to right):
- The groom's father is holding an icon, the bride's mother is holding a loaf of bread, the other parents are just standing nearby.
- Moms hold icons, and dads hold a loaf of champagne.
- One mother holds an icon, the second a loaf, and the fathers stand on the sides.
- One mom holds a folding bag, the other a loaf, and dads hold a glass of champagne.
As you can see, there is no consensus on this matter.
What words should parents say when blessing the newlyweds?
The speech should be sincere, come from the heart and come down to the essence: “We bless you for a long, happy family life.” In this case, it is better to use prose, since a memorized verse is not perceived so mentally, and besides, due to strong excitement, the next line can treacherously slip out of memory.
Where to put icons after the wedding?
The icons participating in the blessing are given to the young family, where they are subsequently kept as a family heirloom. If the newlyweds are deeply religious, they place the icons in a red corner, but if the newlyweds do not want to put the images on public display, then they carefully wrap the icons in a towel and store them in a special place.
In conclusion, some useful tips
1. Icons are not supposed to be held with bare hands, so when purchasing them you should also take care of purchasing towels (by the way, another towel will be needed for the loaf).
2. According to an ancient custom, before the young people kiss the icon, the parents must cross the young people with it three times. Nowadays, this is rarely observed; more often, after a parting speech, the icon is simply brought to the young people for a kiss, but still, if you decide to act according to the rules, you need to correctly make the sign of the cross: from top to bottom, from left to right (for young people it will be from top to bottom, from right to left - as it should be according to church canons).
Words from the groom's parents at the banquet
The father of the groom may speak first. His speech is most often short, but succinct.
Example 1. Dear children! When I got married and was preparing to become the head of my family, my father gave me valuable advice: “In difficult times, just shut up and count to 100.” If my wife and I quarreled, then in order not to say too much to her, I used my father’s advice, and it always worked. Maybe this is also why my mother and I have been living in perfect harmony for decades! I wish you to live a happy and long life, not to accumulate grievances - they destroy, to work on your relationships every day. Love each other, respect and appreciate every moment spent together! Congratulations!
* * *
Example 2. Son, today you are standing on the threshold of a new life. As the popular wisdom says, “Seek your happiness, and if you find it, take care.” You have chosen a wonderful companion, and your first duty is to make her happy. When you first picked up a hammer and hit your finger instead of a nail, you didn’t cry. To your mother’s questions you answered “it doesn’t hurt, I’m a man.” I hope you will prove with every action that you are a real man and the head of the family. Children, I wish you to live a happy and long life, without knowing sorrows and insults. We wish you well-being, prosperity and joy! Congratulations!
Moms are always more sentimental, but still try to pull yourself together.
Example 1. Dear son! Today there is great joy in our family - my dad and I have a daughter. Your meeting is a gift from heaven, but now the main thing is to preserve feelings and fire in your hearts. Family is work, but it is rewarded. Love in the eyes of your soul mate, children's laughter, tears of pride from parents. Be happy, our dear children. Plant trees, raise wonderful children, strengthen your relationships! Your happiness is more valuable to us than all gifts! May there always be prosperity and harmony in your home, and may your love illuminate your path and be your best advisor! May you live happily ever after!
* * *
Example 2. My beloved son. A wise man was once asked what riches should be valued in life. And he answered: the first thing is health, because you can’t buy it for any amount of wealth. And the second is a person who is always nearby. You, son, are very lucky, because you met a wonderful girl. Make sure that she is behind you, like behind a stone wall, so that bitterness and resentment never appear in her eyes, and the smile never leaves her lips. Daughter, support and guide your spouse, become his guiding star - and he will move mountains for you! I congratulate you from the bottom of my heart! I wish happiness, luck and prosperity to settle in your home for a long time. Take care of each other, and keep the flame that you lit today! Bitterly.
Mom and dad can say congratulations one by one, in the form of a dialogue. For example:
Mom: - Our dear son!
Dad: - And daughter!
Mom: - Despite the fact that today you will follow your own path in life, this does not mean that our paths have diverged. Dad and I will always be there when needed. Let us help you with advice
Dad: - And by the way. Walk hand in hand, respect and appreciate each other.
Mom: - May life smile at you and give you only pleasant surprises.
Dad: - Happiness, prosperity, good luck to your young family!
Mom: - May the union be long and strong, together you will reach those heights that cannot be conquered separately.
Dad: - Advice and love!
Mom: - We love you very much, children! Bitterly!
This day is certainly important and exciting for you, but you knew that it would come someday. Rejoice and be proud of your child, and leave worries for later.
- Mother's words at her daughter's wedding
- Wedding congratulations from the groom's parents
- Mother of the groom at the wedding
In every matter with heavenly permission
Not a single magnificent feast is complete without God's blessing. Starting such a great day as a wedding with a prayer to the Almighty is a good tradition of our people. Even today, like a century ago, holidays feature rituals and ceremonies that have their roots in ancient times. We, like our ancestors, bless the young couple for a long and happy life in love, peace and prosperity.
A custom that has passed down through the centuries
Previously, when newlyweds started their life together and left their home, their parents gave them a special gift. These were icons. Images of saints became the basis of the house.
The icons were placed in a place of honor in the red corner. Throughout his life, this part of the house was treated with special respect. The territory was decorated with flowers and embroidered towels. Sincere prayers were heard here. The icons were also supposed to protect the house and its inhabitants from all misfortunes. They gave both family faces and completely new, custom-made icons.
What icon to greet the newlyweds after the registry office, a new one or an old one, is decided by the parents. In general, paintings do not play a big role in this custom, because any face of different shapes and finishes carries equally strong, positive energy. But the very essence of the ritual is important. The symbolism of the ritual is very great. By such actions, parents give the go-ahead to create a new family and continue the family line. The custom also helps to strengthen the bond between the older and younger generations.
How to store icons after the wedding
After the ceremony, the icons are necessarily handed over to the young. From the moment of transmission they are considered a family heirloom. If the family is a believer, then they are placed at home in the red corner (a specially designated place for icons in the house), with a napkin laid under them and covered with a towel.
In general, according to church rules, such images should be placed in the Eastern corner of the house. Next to them are wedding candles or a candle that was used during the ritual of “lighting the hearth candle.” By the way, there is a belief that in order for the family to live in peace and love, such candles should be lit every year on their wedding anniversary.
If the family is not deeply religious and for some reason there is no place in the house for holy images, then they should be carefully wrapped in towels and a special place should be allocated for their storage.
The Lord is always with you!
Watch the video on how to properly bless your daughter or son before the wedding:
Instead of a house - a restaurant
Nowadays the festive lunch is held in cafes or restaurants. The guy's relatives should be standing at the entrance to the establishment. The main thing here is that the groom’s mother knows how the mother-in-law greets the newlyweds after the registry office or wedding, because a lot here depends on her. How she greets her daughter-in-law is how their future life will turn out. This is one of the few customs that has an echo in modern weddings.
At first, parents presented the gift immediately after the official part. As soon as the young people appeared on their doorstep, they were greeted with icons and bread and salt. Then the guests feasted and had fun. Traditionally, the newlyweds were welcomed by the groom's parents, since the young wife was supposed to go live in his house. And although today the wedding scheme has changed somewhat, this ritual has not lost its main essence.
Images of the Mother of God and Jesus Christ from mom and dad - this is how the newlyweds are greeted after the registry office. The guy's parents accept their daughter-in-law into their family. The native girls stand behind along with the guests, since from now on the daughter has moved to another house.
Why you need to bless your son before the wedding: 5 reasons
1. A sign of respect and love for parents.
By asking for a blessing, a kind of family farewell, the son shows his parents his respect, thereby giving them the opportunity to feel their importance. In the complex system that is the family, such a connection between generations, based on love and reverence, is the foundation, the basis of the foundations.
2. Acceptance of the son's choice.
By giving a blessing, parents accept the fact that their son has grown up, become a man, a husband, ready to take responsibility for his family. At the same time, they agree with the son’s choice - the one he wants to introduce into the family as his wife, the mother of his children, their future grandchildren.
3. Sign of parental support.
Obtaining the parental approval of the chosen one is psychologically very important for a son, no matter how old he is. This is like additional proof that your choice is right, because it was blessed by people with family experience whose opinion is valuable to you. The son thus receives parental support in his family endeavors and confidence in his abilities.
4. A way of rallying and unifying.
Path of happiness
It is best if the newlyweds are a little late. Then all the guests will have time to arrive on time. But a happy couple should not linger for a long time and make them wait, because this is disrespectful to friends and family.
Next, the spouses pass through a living corridor. According to our traditions, lovers must pass under embroidered towels, which will be held over their heads by their relatives. The ritual will ensure a happy life for the doves. This is one of the options for meeting young people after the registry office.
Guests can also shower them with flowers, money, and wheat. All these are original symbols. Petals mean a beautiful and lush life, coins attract finances to a new family, and cereals are responsible for abundance and children, which should soon appear. There are also regions where newlyweds are showered with hops to make them have fun, nuts to make their marriage strong, and sweets to make their fate sweet.
Usually the toastmaster should be responsible for this moment. After all, his task is to explain to the public how to properly meet young people after the registry office.
Meeting the newlyweds with a loaf of bread and glasses of wine
In some localities there is a custom to greet newlyweds with a loaf of bread and glasses filled with champagne. However, until the time comes for this ceremony, few people think about how to greet the groom’s young parents with a loaf of bread and champagne.
So, for this you need to prepare a silver tray, new glasses, champagne, two wedding towels and a loaf of bread. The groom's mother greets the newlyweds with a loaf of bread, which must be placed on the towel. And the father at this time holds a tray with glasses and champagne, symbolizing the sweetness of married life.
A second towel is laid in front of the parents, which the newlyweds step on as they approach their parents. A towel is laid under the feet of the young so that their path will be as beautiful, festive, bright and clean. The meeting of the newlyweds with a loaf of bread promises them a rich and happy future.
Main family ritual
The parents of the children are waiting at the threshold of the establishment. In their hands are icons, because they must bless the couple for a happy life. For this ritual, you can take samples from what you have in your home. Usually these are images of the Savior and the Mother of God, but if the family honors other saints, then their images are also acceptable and will not contradict traditions.
For the ceremony, parents must stand nearby. Dad takes the image of Christ, mom takes the image of the Virgin Mary. They often say: “May God bless.” They take turns baptizing the children three times with icons. At this time, the couple bows and kisses the images. This is how the groom's parents greet the newlyweds after the registry office. If the bride's relatives did not bless their child at home, then they can also join the ceremony.
If one of the parents died, their function should be performed by godparents or older relatives.
This tradition should accompany every Christian family, since in this way mothers and fathers give their permission to their children to live together.
How does the blessing ceremony take place?
Despite the fact that modern young people themselves decide who and when they want to marry, the ceremony of blessing remains a rather important and touching moment of the entire wedding. This is probably right, because nothing can cheer you up and give confident guidance for your future life like the kind and sincere words of your parents.
The blessing ceremony can be performed in two ways:
- Orthodox. It follows certain rules. In this ritual, if one of the participants (parents or young people) is not baptized, then you must first cross yourself, and only then carry out the blessing. There must also be icons here. We will look at what icons are used for these purposes below. The whole ritual takes place with the help of icons. But still, in order to conduct the ceremony accurately and correctly, you need to clarify all the nuances with the priest the day before.
- Modern. This type of blessing is used quite often at modern weddings. It is used by young people who are not ready for a serious ceremony, and it has a purely formal look. It can also be performed by non-baptized people. To carry out the ceremony, it is enough to simply ask the parents to prepare a parting speech in advance.
After the blessing ceremony, parents ask the guests to bless their children for a happy life. After the words “God bless,” all the guests accompany the newlyweds to the wedding procession and, having sat in their cars, go to the registry office.
A look into the future
Another ceremony that will take place before the festive dinner is the determination of who will be in charge in the family. A wedding loaf is used for this ritual. This is a richly decorated bread. Salt is often served with it so that the spouses “annoy” each other today and never again.
An obligatory element of the ritual is an embroidered towel on which the holy bread lies. They fold it so that the white cloth is under the sole of the loaf, and the patterns hang down on the sides. Previously, girls wove and embroidered towels even before marriage. The brighter and more magnificent the pattern, the better life will be. Now the amulet can be ordered or bought.
Preparing for the meeting after the registry office
It’s best to order a traditional loaf from a reliable, trusted bakery or bake it yourself, so as not to spoil the important ceremony with bad bread. In addition to fresh baked goods, you will need other accessories:
- a new towel is a long strip of linen fabric with beautiful embroidery and, often, lace fringe along the edges. If you can’t find one, you can get by with a regular towel made of waffle fabric, with a suitable pattern;
- wooden or ceramic salt shaker with an opening lid. It is recommended to use natural salt;
- two glasses of good champagne or red wine.
When making changes to a traditional script, attributes must be taken care of in advance.
Wedding genius - toastmaster
Before biting or breaking bread, you should cross it. Children must kiss the loaf. Very often traditions diverge. Even neighboring cities and villages have rituals unique to them. In order to avoid unpredictable events and problems at the wedding, the action plan should be discussed in detail.
Parents should talk in advance about how to welcome newlyweds after the registry office. This can be done at an engagement party or just before a special day. Each party should first describe how they see the ceremony, and then discuss the differences and write one plan for the ceremony. But here the older generation should also take into account the opinion of children, because first of all it is their day.
If none of the families has any idea what needs to be done, then the script can be entrusted to the toastmaster. It is recommended that you first watch videos of weddings conducted by a professional. This will make it easier to imagine the overall picture and atmosphere, add something to the plan or refuse something.
The ritual of treating guests to a wedding loaf
After the newlyweds meet with a loaf of bread, everyone usually enters the hall to celebrate such an important solemn day. Another important ritual with a loaf at a wedding is the treat. Serving wedding bread is possible both immediately and at the end of the feast. If, according to the scenario, the treat takes place at the beginning of the banquet, then after everyone has taken their seats, the bride and groom must go around the guests without fail. Nuances of the ritual of treating a wedding loaf:
- The young people, starting with their parents, take turns treating them to a loaf of bread, breaking off small pieces.
- Often a tray is carried next to the loaf of bread, where guests put their gifts for the newlyweds.
- You cannot hold auctions for a loaf of bread as a wedding attribute, because bread is sacred. And you need to share it only disinterestedly with pure, kind thoughts.
- If the loaf is served at the end of the celebration, then it is placed in the center of the table and before the end of the feast, the loaf is divided into pieces for the guests.
Sweet life
Another tradition that is popular at the moment is feeding a couple in love with bread and honey. In the morning, one of the relatives must ensure that these products are brought to the establishment. There, the staff will beautifully cut everything and place it on a silver tray. When the spouses approach the festive table, mothers will feed the children this delicacy from their own hands. Next, the parents pass the delicious, sweet sandwich to other guests. Here's how to meet newlyweds after the registry office or wedding.
Don't forget about champagne. Wine glasses can be purchased. Today the choice of wedding products is very large. Their coloring can match the style of the wedding. Sometimes the dishes are tied with ribbon so that the spouses do not leave each other. Having taken three sips from the glass, the lovers pour everything that is left back. Often newlyweds drink for brotherhood. There are regions where after the ceremony the dishes are broken.
Basic and additional points of the tradition of meeting the newlyweds
The ritual of welcoming newlyweds with bread and salt appeared even before the adoption of Christianity in Rus'. At the same time, the nuances of the tradition varied depending on the region, up to the absolute opposite of some stages of the ritual. However, there are unshakable points that were observed everywhere.
- The newlyweds were greeted exclusively by their parents.
- Only loaf and salt were served as treats.
- The children bowed to their parents before tasting the treat.
With the advent of Christianity, the ritual included the blessing of the newlyweds with an icon with the faces of Jesus and the Mother of God. According to modern canons, the tradition involves drinking champagne to the bottom, the glasses of which are brought by the bride’s parents. Afterwards, the newlyweds break the wine glasses. So they drank happiness and got rid of grief. The tradition of breaking faceted glasses came from Peter I. It is unclear when it became established at a wedding, but the roots of this custom are known. For a long time in Slavic villages, the bride broke the pot. The scattered fragments showed her chastity. It was customary to break clay pots on the second day of the wedding. There is a version that broken dishes symbolize farewell to single life.
Final ceremony
Before sitting down and feasting, parents must complete one more mission. They are obliged to say a few good words to their children. If it’s hard for you to come up with congratulations on your own, ask the toastmaster how to greet the newlyweds after the registry office. The words he advises are always successful, but often not emotional. Therefore, it is better to wish something on your own, from the heart. Remember that the speech should be short so as not to bore the guests.
Be sure to remember God and life with faith in him. No one knows children better than you. Therefore, the words you say will be accurate and touching in any case. If you wish, you can tell a beautiful legend or story from childhood. But do not forget that you may still be given the floor during the feast.
Blessing of young parents
As you know, the parental word in Christianity is endowed with special power. It is believed that the message that father and mother address to their children can have a direct impact on their future fate. That is why almost no wedding, both in ancient times and today, is complete without parental blessing. The meaning of this ritual is multifaceted: approval of this union, wishes of all the best and wise parting words to the young family.
How does the modern ceremony of blessing young parents take place?
At modern weddings, the blessing usually occurs when the newlyweds meet from the wedding walk before entering the banquet hall. The parents stand in front of the newlyweds with icons and a loaf of bread, make a short speech, after which the newlyweds kiss the icons, treat themselves to bread and salt, and then follow the instructions of the presenter. This is a simplified version of the ritual. If you follow the ancient canons, then the newlyweds are blessed twice - the first time the parents bless the bride and groom separately in their father's house (before leaving for the registry office), and the second time - jointly as described above.
What icons are used when blessing newlyweds?
Traditionally, the icon of the Mother of God (usually the Kazan icon) and the icon of Christ the Savior are used to bless the newlyweds.
Let's take a closer look at each of them. The Kazan Icon of the Mother of God is one of the most revered images of the Mother of God. She has long been considered the intercessor and patroness of our people; many miracles and amazing salvations are attributed to her. In 2011, this icon went to space! Patriarch Kirill of Moscow and All Rus', handing it over to the space agency, commented on this event: “May the Cover of the Most Pure Queen of Heaven extend over our troubled world, torn apart by contradictions, in which there is so much sorrow and human grief...” This icon is used to bless newlyweds at weddings. in the church. It is of particular importance for women. They pray to her for the birth of children and protection of the house from evil forces. It is with the icon of the Kazan Mother of God that the mother usually blesses her daughter before the wedding (this is done without prying eyes before the newlyweds go to the registry office). The icon “Savior Almighty” (or “Savior”) is the most common image of Christ. On it, Christ holds a book with a quotation from the Gospel with one hand, thereby pointing out the path of salvation, and with the other hand he blesses the person looking at him. This icon is prayed to in times of need and joy. She is asked for the well-being of family members. Previously, the icon of the Savior was the first to be brought into the newlyweds’ house. If the bride’s parents use the icon of the Mother of God to bless their daughter for a happy marriage, then the groom’s parents bless their son with the icon of the Savior. Nowadays, when newlyweds meet, both these icons and one of them are used. As an option, parents can purchase a wedding couple or a fold - these are two icons connected together. You can buy these icons in any of the many church shops in Voronezh.
Which parent holds the icons and loaf of bread during the blessing?
How to distribute roles among themselves, who holds what, who addresses the newlyweds first? These questions usually arise among anxious parents when preparing for the ceremony. As practice shows, there is no single template; these are nuances that can be played out differently at each wedding. Let's look at several options (from left to right):
- The groom's father is holding an icon, the bride's mother is holding a loaf of bread, the other parents are just standing nearby.
- Moms hold icons, and dads hold a loaf of champagne.
- One mother holds an icon, the second a loaf, and the fathers stand on the sides.
- One mom holds a folding bag, the other a loaf, and dads hold a glass of champagne.
As you can see, there is no consensus on this matter.
What words should parents say when blessing the newlyweds?
The speech should be sincere, come from the heart and come down to the essence: “We bless you for a long, happy family life.” In this case, it is better to use prose, since a memorized verse is not perceived so mentally, and besides, due to strong excitement, the next line can treacherously slip out of memory.
Where to put icons after the wedding?
The icons participating in the blessing are given to the young family, where they are subsequently kept as a family heirloom. If the newlyweds are deeply religious, they place the icons in a red corner, but if the newlyweds do not want to put the images on public display, then they carefully wrap the icons in a towel and store them in a special place.
In conclusion, some useful tips
1. Icons are not supposed to be held with bare hands, so when purchasing them you should also take care of purchasing towels (by the way, another towel will be needed for the loaf).
2. According to an ancient custom, before the young people kiss the icon, the parents must cross the young people with it three times. Nowadays, this is rarely observed; more often, after a parting speech, the icon is simply brought to the young people for a kiss, but still, if you decide to act according to the rules, you need to correctly make the sign of the cross: from top to bottom, from left to right (for young people it will be from top to bottom, from right to left - as it should be according to church canons).
3. If one of the young fathers holds the icon during the ceremony, it is necessary to explain to him in advance what is happening and what he needs to do, since men, often far from all kinds of sacraments and religious rituals, may become confused at a key moment.
Blessing of the newlyweds, video clips from different weddings:
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Sample words from mothers at a meeting with a loaf of bread
Clients often ask us to write approximate words for mothers at the “Bread and Salt” ritual (meeting of the Bride and Groom with a loaf)
Mother of the Groom: Our dear children! This loaf is a symbol of prosperity, salt is a warning that life is not always smooth and sweet, but in order for you to overcome the obstacles that life will present you, treat yourself to the loaf, gain strength from this unique day and live your life with dignity and beauty as a strong family! Congratulations!
The newlyweds bite into a loaf.
(or such an option) ... We want your hearts to retain the warmth that this loaf contains. Let your home be full of this warmth, welcome guests and children. Advice and love to you!
(or another option) ... My dear children, I sincerely congratulate you on the beginning of a new path in your life. And on the threshold of this happy beginning, I present you with the main symbol of prosperity and well-being in all things earthly - a wedding loaf. Break off a piece of it and treat each other. I want your hearts to retain the warmth that this loaf has preserved for you. Let your house always be full of guests and let everyone get at least a small piece of food. Let the distribution of this loaf be the beginning of your hospitality. Advice and love to you!
Mother of the Bride: Our dear children, _____________! We congratulate you, bless your marriage, and wish you happiness. Your union is simply a great happiness for us. Advice and love! Here's some water for you to have fun all your life!
(or another option)… Dear children, ___________! We bless you for a strong marriage, for a friendly family. Live in peace and friendship, love and harmony, for your own happiness and for the joy of people! Let the children in your family laugh, let there be peace and prosperity in your home!
What to say when young people meet with a loaf of bread.
In the wedding event, traditions that are sacredly honored by the newlyweds have been preserved to this day. A wedding is the birth of a family. And I want the union of two hearts to beat in unison for many, many years. Therefore, customs that promise only good things for a future family are not forgotten and must be observed. This is also the tradition - the meeting of the newlyweds with the wedding loaf. So, how to greet newlyweds with a loaf of bread, what to say, what to do with the loaf of bread later, and much more - below.
Interesting! Previously, blessing the newlyweds with a loaf of bread was considered a marriage ceremony. Now the tradition has largely been abolished and no longer carries sacred meaning. But in a wedding event this remains the most touching and solemn moment. Parents meet their children in a new status - husband and wife, and the groom's parents welcome their daughter into the family. Read about what kind of anniversary it is and what to give your husband for a paper wedding?