A wedding invitation is a mandatory attribute of wedding etiquette. Even the closest people who, it would seem, do not need to be invited, they will come themselves, definitely need to be given or sent invitations to the wedding. But the design and type of invitation - this depends on the newlyweds themselves.
Traditionally, the first invitees will be your parents. Who will you notify next about the upcoming celebration? A sister or brother is your closest people after your parents! You grew up together, matured and entered into an independent life. And now the news about the upcoming wedding will excite them and give them a sea of emotions. Believe me, an invitation to a wedding for your brother or sister (or maybe you have two?) will be a pleasant moment and will remain in the corners of your memory for a lifetime.
So, let's begin.
We invite you
Natalya Kozhina, AiF.ru: Tatyana Vladimirovna, what is the best way to notify friends, relatives and acquaintances about the upcoming wedding? Is it necessary to send out invitations?
Tatyana Nikolaeva : Having beautifully designed invitations is a tribute to the guests. It is not necessary to send them by courier or by mail; you can use electronic mailing. I note that the sooner future spouses take care of this issue, the better. Of course, there is no need to invite guests a year before the event, but it is better to notify people at least a month in advance.
— Is it necessary to make additional calls after we have sent out the invitations?
— It all depends on what kind of banquet you are planning. If we are talking about a buffet table, this is not necessary. But in the case when each guest is assigned a specific place at the table, they usually write: “Please answer +7 (111) 111 1111” - this is the standard wording. As a rule, the number of the organizer or the person who helps with the celebration is indicated, since the bride and groom can be very busy preparing for the celebration.
You can also use the international designation RSVP (Répondez s'il vous plaît - French) in the invitation. Such a signature encourages the recipient to respond about participation in the event. The task of the invited person is to notify the future spouses of his decision as soon as possible; there is no need to waste time.
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— If you cannot attend a wedding, what is the correct way to refuse in such situations?
— You can notify your future spouses in writing of your refusal or call the phone number indicated in the invitation. The last option is more preferable. Of course, it is better to explain your refusal. Valid reasons are considered: departure, illness, family problems, for example, the loss of a relative, planned vacation.
Of course, first you need to say words of gratitude for the invitation, and then the phrase: “I’m sorry, but I cannot attend the event for such and such a reason.”
By the way, even if a person does not attend the wedding, this does not exempt him from the need to give a gift. How the gift will be delivered to the newlyweds is a personal matter; you can always use the services of the post office or courier.
— It’s rare when a family can invite all relatives and acquaintances to a wedding; who must be invited and who not?
- You are free to call whoever you see fit, depending on your capabilities. Alas, it often happens that we cannot invite even close relatives to the celebration, since the number of places is limited. Resentment on their part is inappropriate in this situation. Never forget that everyone has different capabilities.
As for the presence of guests during the ceremony at the registry office, it is better for parents and witnesses to attend. For everyone else - optional.
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Making an invitation with your own hands
You can create an invitation card with your own hands using popular techniques:
- Scrapbooking.
- Video invitation.
- Scroll.
- In Tiffany style.
- Edible invitations.
- On a chocolate bar.
- Photo collage.
- Original photo.
- Audio invitation.
- Fruit bouquet with a postcard.
There are a large number of master classes on the Internet that allow you to create a product using one technique or another. If you are an amateur in this matter, then you should choose the simplest option for yourself. Close relatives will appreciate your attention to their person.
Seating rules
— How to properly organize seating at the table?
— A wedding is the only formal reception when the newlyweds are seated next to each other. In all other cases, if people are aware of the intricacies of etiquette, the couple is separated so that the guests communicate with each other, maintain their social duties, and make new acquaintances. For a month after the wedding, the newlyweds still sit together, and after this period - separately.
It is best for men and women at such events to be seated in a checkerboard pattern: man, woman, man, woman, etc. This is done so that the gentleman will court the lady who is sitting at the table to his right. Accordingly, the bride will be on the right hand of the groom. According to this principle, parents can be seated next to them.
It is also a good option when the rest of the guests are seated at separate tables of several people. This is done so that those present can meet at least a small number of new relatives. In this case, when seating, a simple principle is taken into account - people should have common topics for conversation.
— Is it better to do the seating by name?
— It all depends on the banquet organizers. If the newlyweds decide to assign seats at the table at their own discretion, then cards should be placed. When there are a lot of guests, it is better to post a seating chart in the foyer. Someone must meet the invitees at the door (relatives, host, special person), greet them, offer aperitifs, and help them navigate the seating arrangement. If there are few guests and there is one table for everyone, you can do without a diagram.
— Is it acceptable to be late for a wedding?
— You can be late by a maximum of 15 minutes, but you shouldn’t arrive very early either. According to the rules of etiquette, you have the right to arrive only 10 minutes before the stated start of the evening. Otherwise, your appearance will interfere and distract the organizers. Even if you arrived very early, go for a walk, mind your business, but do not come to the banquet.
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How can you make invitations for close relatives even more interesting and enjoyable?
If you and your loved one are going to visit your grandparents, then for tea and the obligatory subsequent discussion of the wedding, take with you their favorite cake and a box of delicious tea. This will create a warm family atmosphere when talking.
For grandparents, you can burn a disc or flash drive with a video wedding invitation . They will definitely appreciate such a surprise and watch the video several times. And then, in a few years, they will show it to their great-grandchildren.
If you need to send an invitation to another city, then to create a good impression, you can send a box of sweets or cookies . This will pleasantly surprise the recipient and double the desire of relatives to put aside all their affairs and come to the wedding.
Wedding invitations for relatives
When sending invitations to your sister and brother in another city, include a funny photo in which you and your chosen one are in a funny pose or in funny costumes. You can sign it, for example, like this:
“I’ll be in black, arm in arm with this lady. I ask you to love and favor both. For information about wedding details, see another envelope. Your ___ (name).”
Regardless of how you decide to design your invitations, remember that the best way is to hand them over personally to everyone. When you meet, you can not only share a piece of joy with a loved one, but also find out about the opportunity for a relative to attend the wedding.
Indecent gesture
— How do you know how much to spend on a gift?
— You determine the size based on your personal financial capabilities. Newlyweds should under no circumstances worry about the fact that someone gave them a cheap present.
— What can’t be given as a wedding gift?
- Money, unless you know the bride and groom well, and this can also happen. In general, giving money to strangers is an indecent gesture. Alas, few people understand this, and most still believe that it is better to present just such a gift. But this is humiliating!
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— In an envelope, with one bill, if possible. Of course, if you give 4,000 rubles, then the best option is 1,000, i.e. you take banknotes of the highest denomination. It is also desirable that the money be new, not worn. If you don’t want to rack your brains over what to give, then at least take care of this detail.
When handing over an envelope with money, under no circumstances should you take out its contents and proudly display it to everyone present. This is indecent and immodest.
— When is the best time to give a gift, at the beginning of the celebration, in the middle?
— At weddings there is often a moment when the event organizer goes around everyone with a tray, and the guests put their gifts on it. Usually these are just envelopes. In fact, well-mannered people give gifts when they come to a celebration, so newlyweds should think about organizing this moment.
Of course, on such a day, the bride and groom don’t really look at or unpack the presents. If they start doing this, as is customary on other holidays, the process may take more than one hour. The couple’s task is to thank the guests and give the gift to the assistants, or put it away themselves in a specially designated place. Of course, you can’t just leave the envelopes; they should definitely be given to someone for temporary storage.
Another important nuance, since gifts at a wedding are not immediately looked at, you need to provide it with a postcard with congratulations, wishes and the signature or business card of the donors.
If you are not sure when exactly you should give a gift, but you know the bride and groom well, you can safely ask them how best to proceed in this situation. Is there a special time planned for presenting gifts, or is it better to do it at the entrance? Let me emphasize once again that the latter option is more preferable, since many guests come with flowers. Agree that sitting with a bouquet and waiting for the donation ceremony to begin is inconvenient.
— Is it necessary to give flowers for a wedding?
— By and large, there is nothing mandatory in matters relating to gifts. Still, flowers are welcome. But again, if you don’t think it’s necessary to purchase a bouquet, that’s your own business.
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— Can I use gift lists?
- Yes, and some young people are already doing this. But we must take into account the fact that not all guests are ready to follow them. This is absolutely normal. A person may simply not have enough money for what you ordered, or the options you offer contradict his tastes. In any case, the guest should have the right to choose something of his own. And older people, most likely, simply will not be able to use such a “hint.”
As for the algorithm for posting lists, it is better to do this on the Internet, on a special page, so that guests can write online who is ready to buy what.
By the way, there are situations when the family is very wealthy and the newlyweds do not need any gifts. If such a point is included in the invitation, it is important to respect the wishes of the couple. The only thing you can give is flowers.
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- Tatyana Vladimirovna, how can you thank guests for gifts after the celebration?
— At the end of the feast, the groom must thank the guests for coming, and separately for the gifts. And the next day, within 24 hours, the young people need to call everyone present to thank them again for the gifts.
Author's text to brother in verse
Invitation to sister's wedding.
The text of the invitation card itself will be based on the kind of relationship that prevails between relatives. These are not always warm and trusting feelings; often there is mutual banter.
One of the popular versions is an invitation card written in poetic form. It doesn't have much content. As a rule, it reflects the main essence of the issue. Invitation to sister's wedding text:
“My dear brother, you are the best in the world. We, often being together, rejoiced like children, Thank you for your smile, For your kind eyes. You always forgave me for my mistakes and didn’t look down on me. And even though you are much older, And this means that you are much wiser, You have always become a part of My bright and clear days. So I ask you today, To share with me that moment, In which I will definitely be Rejoice that I have achieved love. And you will be there, You will smile as always. And for nothing in the world, the years will not separate us.”
As a rule, after the poetic form there is a part where the place, time and date of the celebration are mentioned. With proper skill, you can include such information in the main part of the poem.
How to fill out invitations - rules
Filling out invitations with high quality will allow you to avoid awkward moments with guests and unnecessary questions about the ceremony. In addition to information, invitations should include an address to the guest. Many newlyweds like to order wedding cards from a printing house, which is a pretty good solution.
The invitation must contain the following information:
- date and time of the beginning of the ceremony. If desired, you can also indicate the approximate time of completion of the celebration;
- names and surnames of those to whom the invitation was sent.
- the place where the holiday will be held. You can specify the address and name of the establishment;
- style of celebration planned dress code. Guests should be prepared for all surprises. If there are no surprises, you can indicate that a dress code is optional.
- names of the newlyweds with their signatures.
Silver wedding anniversary: 25 years of marriage
After how many years of marriage is the silver wedding celebrated? The silver anniversary of marriage is twenty-five years of family life in which the spouses were together in sorrow and in joy, in sickness and in health.
Why is the 25th wedding anniversary called silver? Silver and gold are considered noble metals, but gold is valued higher, which is why the 50th wedding anniversary is called gold, and the 25th wedding anniversary is called silver.
Silver is a noble metal, but not very durable; over time, silver becomes dull if you don’t take care of it and polish it to a shine. Marriage requires the same attitude: spouses should not allow it to fade, they need to make every effort to renew their relationship all the time
So, we found out what kind of wedding is called a silver wedding, now let's talk about what the status is about a silver wedding. But first, about folk customs for the 25th wedding anniversary. These, of course, are not all the traditions and customs of a silver wedding, but they are worth observing:
The tradition of drinking tea on a silver wedding anniversary. Whether or not to observe wedding signs is up to you, especially since we could not find any special signs in relation to a silver wedding.
What to cook for a festive feast
Every wedding is accompanied by a rich feast. The silver wedding is no exception. If you are celebrating it in a restaurant, then all you have to do is agree on the menu . If the celebration takes place at home or outdoors, then the hostess of the holiday has the opportunity to show off her culinary talents.
But in order for her to have the strength for the celebration itself, she will have to involve her children, family and friends in preparing the festive table. There is another possibility - to order at least some of the dishes in a restaurant or cafe, and the family will handle the serving on their own.
A wedding cake crowns the banquet at both the first and silver weddings, so it is better to order it from an experienced pastry chef
Professionals make incredibly beautiful cakes in one or several tiers, decorated with silver ribbons, flowers, pairs of swans or doves - symbols of fidelity and other confectionery delights.
Silver Wedding Anniversary Cake
Such a cake will become a real apotheosis of a festive feast.
