In ancient Rus', it was customary that the wedding feast was paid for by the groom’s side, because when girls got married, they had a rich dowry with them, which their parents collected for them from birth. Nowadays, the approach to wedding expenses has changed significantly. And disputes often arise about who will pay for what at the wedding. The portal Svadbaholik.ru offers to understand this difficult issue.
What the groom traditionally has to pay:
— wedding fee; - gifts for your parents; - gifts for your friends; — an engagement ring for your other half; - boutonnieres for your friends; - waiters hired for a wedding banquet; - bride's wedding bouquet; - wedding gift for the bride; - cortege for the wedding and transportation of guests after the end of the banquet; - accommodation of your friends, if the wedding is organized outside the locality where each of them lives; — accommodation for all guests from their side who came from another locality; - your suit and everything that should come with it; - full honeymoon.
Parents and relatives of the bride pay for:
— the bride’s wedding dress and all accessories; - wedding invitations; - gifts for future newlyweds; - bridesmaids boutonnieres; — rent of the premises in which the wedding ceremony will be held; — gifts for guests (compliments); - complete decoration of the hall in which the wedding banquet will be held; — wedding buffet menu; — services of a professional video operator and photographer; - music.
Of course, these rules are not dogma and everyone can change them to suit themselves. For example, if future newlyweds decided to start a family while still students or just graduating from university, then, of course, their parents will share all the costs of the wedding among themselves. Of course, in the opposite situation - if the bride and groom are already sufficiently wealthy and earn good money, then the costs of the wedding can be partially or completely distributed among themselves, almost without attracting funds from parents and relatives.
Payment for services
The average wedding budget includes payment for the services of a toastmaster (if there are more than ten guests, then you cannot do without a host) and a photographer. You can skip the video if your budget doesn’t allow it. How much does a toastmaster cost for a wedding? A good presenter with a DJ will cost at least 15-20 thousand rubles, on average you need to budget 40-50 thousand for these expenses.
The price of a photographer for a wedding (services include a photo of the bride during preparation, a visit to the registry office, a walk, a restaurant, creation of a wedding book) will be about 15-20 thousand. Additionally, you can shoot a pre-wedding love story or a video declaration of love. This will be a wonderful gift for your beloved spouse. A wedding photographer (the price in this case will be several times higher) can work in tandem with a cameraman.
Depending on the scale of the celebration and the wishes of the newlyweds, the services of wedding planners and decorators may be needed.
Wedding expenses: who should pay for what?
There are no special traditions regulating who should pay for what in the process of preparing for a wedding.
According to ancient Russian traditions, it was believed that the wedding feast should be paid for by the groom's family, because the parents had already prepared a dowry for the bride, which they began to collect for the girl, starting from birth.
In some cultures, it was believed that the bride's parents should pay for the wedding, since the groom would support her for the rest of her life.
In Ukraine, there is still a tradition in some places according to which the groom must buy the bride a dress, shoes and a veil, and the remaining expenses are divided in half between the families.
Of course, earlier, when the age of the bride and groom was 15-16 years, or even less, parents paid exclusively. And it was enough for families to agree on who would pay for what. In this matter, agreement has always been a priority over all traditions. If the family of one of the future spouses was much richer than the second family, then by common agreement they could take on larger expenses.
Nowadays, when more and more often already established young people who work and even have savings are getting married, the tradition of paying for the wedding entirely by parents is no longer so relevant. Moreover, future spouses prefer to pay for the wedding themselves, while having every moral right to arrange it in the way they see fit, and to invite only those guests whom they really want to see.
Today, wedding expenses can be distributed in different ways.
The tradition of parents paying for the wedding entirely is no longer so relevant.
Option 5 – take out a loan
Who pays for the wedding? Bank! Yes, it also happens that a couple takes out a loan to organize the holiday they have always dreamed of. This position is understandable, because most people only have a wedding once in their life. At the same time, we do not advise anyone to start their family life with debts. Believe me, a wedding is only one day, albeit an important one, and you will live together for many, many years (some of them while paying off the loan). Do not take out a loan for the holiday, it is better to sign at the registry office, and postpone the celebration itself for a while to raise money for it.
Parents of the bride and groom pay for the wedding
This option occurs when the bride and groom are very young, do not have savings and the ability to pay for the celebration.
Naturally, in this case, you can have a very modest wedding. However, often the parents themselves insist on a grand celebration if they have the opportunity to pay for the banquet.
Undoubtedly, there are also cases when young people want to pay for the wedding themselves, but parents consider themselves obligated to take full responsibility for the financial part of organizing the event, and most importantly, they have such an opportunity.
Expenses between the parents of the newlyweds can be divided exactly in half or in proportion to the number of guests invited to the wedding. There are cases when the number of relatives and friends of the bride significantly exceeds the number of guests from the groom, and vice versa.
The bride and groom pay for the wedding
If the future spouses are already confident enough to stand on their own two feet and earn good money, they prefer to take on all expenses themselves. Just like in the first option, they either divide the costs equally or in proportion to the number of guests.
If parents still insist on providing at least minimal assistance, then they can, for example, pay for the bride’s dress and the groom’s suit. Often the bride's parents pay for her wedding dress as a gift.
Parents always have the opportunity to give money at a festive banquet or even give the newlyweds an apartment and a car. Such a gift will undoubtedly be much more significant than all the wedding expenses.
Court practice
So, for example, by the ruling of the Supreme Court of the Russian Federation dated November 3, 2017 N 309-KG17-15716, the resolution of the Arbitration Court of the Volga-Vyatka District dated October 14, 2019 N F01-4899/2019, the applicant’s request to cancel the act of the Pension Fund body on additional accrual of insurance benefits was satisfied. contributions (and resulting penalties and fines) on the basis that financial assistance during marriage registration was not remuneration for the employee, since it did not depend on working conditions.
A similar position is set out in the resolution of the Seventh Arbitration Court of Appeal dated July 25, 2017 No. 07AP-5424/2017 in case No. A27-6618/2017, the resolution of the Fifteenth Arbitration Court of Appeal dated September 2, 2016 No. 15AP-8331/2016 in case No. A53-33784/ 2015 and other judicial acts. Thus, extensive judicial practice has developed that makes it possible to unambiguously regulate the issue of calculating insurance premiums for this payment, as well as classifying such payment as a type of income that is not included in wages.
The parents of both spouses and the bride and groom pay for the wedding
If you have chosen this option, but cannot agree on who exactly should pay for what, use the European model for the distribution of wedding expenses, which we have adapted to our realities.
Wedding expenses between parents, bride and groom are distributed as follows:
- wedding ring for the groom;
- accommodation of parents, relatives and friends if they came from another city;
- wedding gifts for the groom's parents.
The bride's parents pay:
- decoration of the banquet hall;
- banquet;
- services of presenter, artists, photographer and videographer;
- bride's dress;
- bridesmaids' dresses (if provided);
- wedding procession;
- wedding invitations.
- engagement and wedding ring for the bride;
- state registration of marriage and church wedding (if provided);
- a hotel room where the newlyweds will spend their wedding night;
- the bride's bouquet;
- flowers to decorate a wedding banquet;
- bridesmaids' bouquets (if provided);
- a boutonniere for yourself;
- boutonnieres for the groom's friends, as well as other accessories if they are provided for by the wedding style (special ties, gloves or hats);
- Honeymoon.
The groom's parents pay:
- groom's suit;
- gift for newlyweds.
As you can see at first glance, the costs are not evenly distributed. The short list of expenses of the groom's parents is especially confusing. However, remember that something very significant and expensive can act as a wedding gift. Naturally, the distribution of costs should be carefully reviewed for each individual family.
Lieman.ru
>
Articles
>
Who should pay for the wedding?
Difficulties in relationships
Who should pay for the wedding?
There are many happy moments and events in life, and some of them have a fateful meaning for each of us. And one of these important events is a wedding, which unites two previously different people into one strong family. And it’s not for nothing that at all times they paid so much attention to wedding rituals, vows and ceremonies. After all, it was believed that a wedding is the first step towards the well-being of the family. And significant funds were spent by the newlyweds and their families on this holiday.
But now life has undergone significant changes, people have become sensitive to the issue of money. And if we take into account that wedding ceremonies have begun to cost more than annual salaries, then the question: “Who pays for what at a wedding?” — has become more relevant than ever before.
How to pay for a wedding
There are three ways to pay for a wedding: the bride and groom share the costs evenly; the bride's parents pay for the wedding; devoted.
Everything is equal. The traditional split of wedding costs equally is the easiest to understand around the world. It has been practiced for centuries, everyone knows this method and agrees quite readily. Its essence lies in the fact that the entire cost of wedding expenses is divided equally, and everyone contributes the amount necessary for this.
Very often, this payment system is used by young couples who do not want to invite a large number of relatives and friends, and their funds have a strict limit. It's convenient and simple.
However, if the bride’s side plans to purchase an expensive wedding dress, then in this case it is reasonable to pay for the clothes of each spouse separately. Since the cost of a wedding dress sometimes exceeds the cost of a husband’s suit by 5 or more times! And this is significant money.
The wedding is paid for by the bride's side. The bride's side pays for the ceremony itself, the bride's dress, music, wedding, wedding photos, transportation and invitations. Their expenses also include a banquet. Although the costs of a wedding do not seem to be distributed equally, it makes sense.
The bride's side actually pays for the entire wedding, but the groom's family pays for the entire honeymoon. The groom also pays for his own suit and registration fee. This system is used in fairly wealthy families, where the parties are allowed to demonstrate their generosity and ability to organize a good holiday.
Devoted. If we return to traditions, some people practice a rather interesting way of paying for a wedding. In this case, absolutely all expenses, with the exception of the wedding dress, are paid by the groom. And the bride’s side is preparing a devotional that will allow the family to start their life faster. Usually the gifts are: cars, apartments, houses or vacant positions for the groom in the bride's family business.
What you also need to remember when paying for a wedding
The desire of one of the parties. Remember that it is not always necessary to follow traditions. If one of the parties has wealthy parents or someone agrees to cover all expenses, then you should agree to such conditions and not worry. A wedding is of great importance for the entire family, and there is no need to put your personal interests and focuses above your relatives.
What you shouldn't save on. Nowadays, some young people, as well as a large number of older people, prefer to get married without a ceremony or expense. On the one hand, it’s clear why people do this: extra costs, lack of desire to “play” to the public, and more. But, on the other hand, our ancestors were not fools. They understand perfectly well that when a girl puts on a wedding dress, she realizes in her head that it’s time to grow up.
Therefore, if you do not want a ceremony, then still buy your future wife a wedding dress and have a photo shoot. Let her understand for herself that she is now a wife! This should be fixed in her head, and not in her passport.
Young people. Some young men believe that they, as men, should pay for the wedding themselves and take their own bride. And if a man wants to do just that, then there is no need to object and come up with various tricks. As the man said, this is how it should be.
+54
The bride pays for the wedding
It may be quite possible that at the time of marriage the bride turns out to be more financially wealthy than the groom, or has savings. Although, from experience, this happens quite rarely. More often than not, the father of the bride bears all the costs associated with organizing the wedding celebration.
As you can see, there are many options. Typically, issues of distribution of expenses are usually discussed on the day of engagement, when the future spouses officially declare their intention to get married. Only thanks to a clear agreement even before the start of organizing the wedding, can you come to a single decision about who will pay for what. At the same time, it is important to ensure that neither party feels awkward or incurs unaffordable expenses.
Sources:
https://youmarriage.ru/raskhody-na-svadbu-kto-iz-chlenov-semi-za-chto-platit/ https://lieman.ru/article165 https://the-wedding.ru/svadebnye-traty -kto-za-cho-doljen-platit/
