Wedding candles after the death of one of the spouses. Wedding icons and candles

What to do with wedding icons?

All newlyweds want their union to last until old age. However, in real life, alas, the situation is somewhat different, and the number of people wishing to get a divorce is almost greater than the number of newly married couples.

What to do with a towel after a divorce?

Another option is to give this bright attribute to a not too superstitious lady who is getting married. After all, it is known that a wedding ceremony is a very expensive affair for any budget. So why throw away or uselessly store something that may be useful to others?

Wedding ring

It is that hidden amulet that belongs exclusively to you. That is why it is not recommended to give the ring to anyone to try on (this may negatively affect your family life).

If a divorce ensues, you can’t throw away or sell the ring either. The most reasonable solution would be to melt down the ring, making it into another product or simply changing the design. Keep it for yourself as a decoration or give it to your daughter; it will not bring any negativity. There is another option - donate it to the temple.

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How many candles do you need for a wedding?

Two people are getting married and each person gets one candle.

The newlyweds enter the church along with witnesses. Then the bride and groom stand on the towel, and the friends remain standing behind them. The priest hands the wedding couple a candle and lights them. The candles burn until the end of the ceremony, then the Holy Father extinguishes them and hands them over to the witnesses. It is recommended to do this with your fingers rather than blowing it out.

All you need to do after the wedding with a towel and candles is to keep them and not pass them on to other people.

Expert opinion

Priests advise all those who were married in church and then divorced not to pay special attention to wedding paraphernalia. There will be nothing wrong with candles, icons, towels and other things remaining in your home. Not only do they not harm, but they also help. Blessed objects cannot carry negative energy. And if you ever feel heavy in your soul or something unpleasant happens, you can always receive powerful and strong blessed help. However, if all the wedding paraphernalia evokes negative emotions in you, you can deal with it as follows.

How to store wedding candles

Answering the question of where candles go after a wedding, it should be noted that the main place for their storage is the house or apartment of those who were married to them. Such candles, according to established tradition, are kept in the family after the Sacrament of Marriage, as a reminder that the marriage of people is blessed by God Himself. In addition, wedding candles are used at home for their intended purpose - they can be lit.

In what cases can they be lit?

It is recommended to light wedding candles after the wedding:

On our wedding anniversary.
In difficult life moments to make a decision.
Before the upcoming separation.
When children get sick.
In order to prevent divorce.

When wedding candles are used frequently after a wedding, there is a high risk of damage. Then they can be glued with melted wax over the broken surface, secured with adhesive tape, or used each part separately.

Candles are taken out of a secluded place for a short time, so that by the light of their fire one can turn to God for help or with gratitude.

How to choose wedding dresses?

The wedding ceremony takes from 45 minutes to an hour, so you need to choose candles that are long, but not too wide so that they are comfortable to hold.

It would be good if the candles had special handles and saucers. Then the dripping wax will not burn your hands or ruin your clothes. Fabric lace napkins, handkerchiefs and potholders are also used.

The traditional color of candles is white. Golden or pink shades are allowed. Products can be either simple, without decoration, or decorated. For decoration, chains, glass beads, lace, ribbons, polymer clay, fabric, etc. are used. Decorative elements should be paired, for example, two hearts, two rings.

You can purchase ready-made products at a church shop, or you can make them yourself from wax or paraffin. Items made with your own hands or purchased outside of the church must first be consecrated. It is better not to buy them secondhand, as there is a high risk of receiving low-quality products.

They do not take other people's wedding attributes for the sacrament , even if the people who offer them have lived their whole lives in a happy marriage. Moreover, the priests say that there is nothing wrong with this, but the candles are a sacrifice in favor of the church, so it is better to buy them in the temple where the ceremony will be held.

What you need to buy

Wedding candles

Which ones are better to choose?

Candles are sold in the church shop: you can buy them there on the day of the celebration or in advance.

Candles of a certain design can be found in online stores: from the most ordinary wax candles to products of various colors, shapes and sizes, decorated with small bouquets, patterned modeling, ribbons, rings, hand or factory painting, glitter (sparkles), decals (images with a paper base ), in a package or with candlesticks, etc. Their choice is a matter of taste, the main thing is that they are wedding candles.

What are they for?

Wedding candles are obligatory “participants” of the wedding ceremony. This is a sign of the joy that lovers experience from meeting each other. The candles burning in the hands of the newlyweds embody the chastity of the newlyweds, the fiery and pure mutual love that they must nourish from now on, as well as the abiding grace of God.

After the sacrament, the candles remain with the newlyweds . They should be kept at home near icons or in another secluded pious place and the symbol of marriage should be lit in connection with some important and joyful events, on marriage anniversaries or, conversely, if difficult times come. There is a belief that wedding candles can ease difficult childbirth.

How much do they cost? On average, a set of candles costs from 300 to 1000 rubles.

Handkerchiefs for candles

Which ones are better to choose?

First of all, they should be white or light colors. These can be handkerchiefs or fabric napkins, with lace, embroidery or simpler ones. You can often buy specially made pot holders in church shops.

What are they for?

The tradition of covering the hands with a scarf has been around for centuries. But this is done more for practical reasons - so that they do not get dirty and burnt with wax.

How much do they cost? The cost of special potholders is approximately 800–1000 rubles. Regular handkerchiefs or cloth napkins are much cheaper.

What icons are needed for a wedding?

Which ones are better to choose?

These should be the faces of the Savior and the Mother of God - separately or in the form of a folding icon, that is, a folding icon made of two parts. The choice of such icons, it turns out, is also varied. They differ in size (from 7×12 and larger), shape (arched or rectangular), design (in a plastic, wooden or other frame; brass, metallized, gold-plated, etc.; with embossing, silk-screen printing, enamel, velvet; in a case and without it, etc.).

What are they for?

With their help, the priest blesses the bride and groom. In former times, images were brought from the parental home and this is how the home shrine was passed on from generation to generation .

Nowadays, icons of the Savior and the Mother of God are purchased in advance by the parents of the newlyweds in the church shop and given to the priest before the start of the ceremony. If the parents do not participate in the marriage, the young people do it themselves.

How much do they cost? The price range is quite wide. The cost depends on the size and materials and ranges from 50 to 20,000 rubles.

Wedding towel – “foot”

Which one is better to choose?

The towel on which the newlyweds will ascend at the altar should be white or pink.

In the past, the bride and groom could only kneel, but nowadays they usually stand on a towel with their feet, because there is a belief that you don’t need to choose a towel with the image of rings or a pair of birds as a wedding towel: it’s better to opt for a geometric pattern or floral ornament around the edges. And the center of the canvas - the symbolic place of God - must be “clean”.

A towel with hemstitch or lace is not suitable for marriage: they deprive family life of integrity. The canvas should not be interrupted, just as the life together of the spouses should not be interrupted.

What is it needed for

This attribute of the wedding ceremony is a symbol of unity and purity of married life. It is spread out near the lectern and serves as a footstool for the bride and groom; on it, the young, as if on a cloud, ascend to the Kingdom of Heaven to bless their marriage.

After the ceremony, the towel most often remains with the newlyweds: it is kept in the family as a memory and decorates the house on anniversaries and anniversaries.

How much does it cost ? A wedding towel with embroidery costs on average from 500 to 2000 rubles, a simple towel costs less.

What rings are needed for a wedding?

Which ones are better to choose?

Traditionally, the bride and groom's rings should be made of different precious metals: his - gold, hers - silver (then the young couple will exchange them during the sacrament). This difference is symbolic.

Nowadays, this rule is not always observed, and wedding rings can even have precious stones. Therefore, the choice of jewelry completely depends on the taste and financial capabilities of the groom: according to tradition, it is he who should buy the rings - preferably on the same day and in the same place.

What are they for?

Rings are the central attribute of engagement. Before the ceremony begins, they lie on the holy throne on the right - in front of the face of Jesus Christ. Thus, by touching the holy throne, they receive the power of sanctification and the ability to bring God’s blessing to the newlyweds. And the fact that the rings lie next to each other means mutual love and spiritual unity of the bride and groom.

This is a multi-valued symbol .
Firstly, a sign of the indissolubility, limitlessness and eternity of the marriage union. Secondly, the embodiment of the sun, to which the husband is likened; silver represents the moon - a smaller luminary that emits light reflected from the sun. The actions performed with the rings during the sacrament also have important sacred meaning. Thus, the exchange of jewelry speaks of love and willingness to sacrifice everything and help throughout life - on the part of the groom, and of love and devotion, readiness to accept this help throughout life - on the part of the bride.

How much do they cost? The price of wedding rings will depend on the metal from which they are made (you should not choose a combination of metals, as this is considered a bad omen) and the presence or absence of precious stones.

Wedding set

Which one is better to choose?

The range of wedding sets today is also very wide. They differ in the number of items, style and cost. The set usually includes a towel, towels, napkins for wedding rings, and potholders for candles.

What is it needed for

Buying a wedding set will save the bride and groom from having to purchase all textile wedding accessories separately, selecting them by color and design, and will save them precious time .

How much does it cost? On average, a set of 4 items costs 1000–2000 rubles, and of 7 – 3000–5000 rubles.

Red wine

Which one is better to choose?

“Cahors” or “Sherry” are bought as a drink for the “cup of fellowship” ritual .

What is it for?

The red wine offered by the priest to the young is a symbol of their true love: the fresh water of their true feelings should turn into a strong drink from year to year.

How much does it cost? A bottle of good Cahors or Spanish sherry can cost from 700 to 7000 rubles.

What else should you take to church?

In addition to everything listed above, newlyweds should take with them the following documents and items:

Passports .
Marriage certificate (except for those rare cases when the wedding - in agreement with the priest - precedes registration with the registry office).
Pectoral crosses (they should hang on the neck).

How to treat candles correctly

Speaking about how to store wedding candles at home and how to use them, it is important to say a few words about the correct attitude towards such candles and all others too. By themselves, neither wedding candles nor any other candles can help a person. The Lord God, the Mother of God and the saints help believers through their sincere prayers. At the same time, people’s lives themselves should be as consistent as possible with the commandments and Orthodox faith. But the attitude towards candles, and other attributes of faith, as something magical that fulfills any desires is absolutely non-Christian, but magical, pagan. And Orthodox Christians should not have such an attitude towards the attributes of faith, but should have a reverent, respectful attitude.

If you are interested in wedding candles

,wax

or
paraffin
, then you will always find them in a wide range in the Letopis online store.

Wedding dress

There are no special regulations in this regard. The wedding dress can be sold, rented, or donated to the church (it will be given to someone who needs it). You can also simply give the dress as a gift or alter it to your daughter, making it a beautiful outfit for a ball or New Year's holidays. There will be nothing wrong if you leave it hanging in the closet or even get married in it next time. Experts assure that there is no danger in this. However, if you are in doubt, it is still better not to do this.

Wedding candles after divorce

Church ministers do not advise inventing anything regarding these wedding attributes, namely, about their mystical power. All these are just superstitions and distorted ideas about the true meaning of these wedding attributes. Therefore, you should not place your hopes on them that they will be able to return their spouse to the family if there is no reciprocity between them.

Many people wonder what to do with such candles if the destinies of the spouses diverged and they had to get a divorce. The most important thing is not to give them to anyone. They can be burned in front of the icons or taken to the temple and lit there. The last idea is very sound, where they were born should disappear into the centuries, and you can also ask God for the health of each of the spouses for the future. Let people go with good thoughts!

When do they light it?

Wedding candles are endowed with the power of the prayer that the priest read during the ceremony of heavenly marriage. That is why it is appropriate to light a candle when difficulties begin in the family. For example, a baby is sick or a marriage is about to break up. At this moment, you should ask for help from your spiritual patrons; only bright and kind requests should be made. Yes, you say - let them hear you.

Also, some priests recommend lighting them in honor of some significant event for the family. For example, the birth of a baby or getting rid of a serious illness. To do this, candles must be lit in front of the icons with which the parents blessed the spouses for a long and happy marriage, and be sure to read a prayer. How many candles you light (one or two) does not matter. After all, the young are now one. They are members of the same family and the candles belong to both of them.

What to do with champagne after divorce?

This wedding attribute is much more worldly than icons or wedding rings. Therefore, you can deal with a bottle of fizzy drink intended for drinking in honor of a wedding anniversary or the birth of a child as your intuition suggests.

If you still have bad feelings towards your former lover, you can find a sparsely populated place and wholeheartedly break a glass bottle on a hard surface . Just don’t forget to clean up the shards afterwards!

Publications

Hieromonk Seraphim (Kalugin), Astrakhan, answers readers' questions.

Hieromonk Seraphim (Kalugin), Astrakhan, answers readers' questions.

I have a question for you. How you can influence your husband with the help of wedding candles or prayers (and what prayers). My husband and I have been married for 6 years, we are married, our families are very religious people. I was his faithful wife, a year ago he cheated on me, I forgave him, but the problem is that he filed for divorce (threatening me) because he wants to leave me for that girl. But I love him very much and I want to live only with him, I see from him that he also hesitates, we have been struggling for a year now. I suspect that she somehow bewitched him, he loved me very much, and now he leaves and cries. This means that there is still something left for me... How can I help our falling apart family if I really want to save it, no matter what. Tell me, please.

Hello, Victoria. Indeed, in these damned days it is becoming increasingly difficult to keep a family together. The corruption and decline of morals reach such a point that I cannot stop crimes against the closest, dearest and dearest people.

It is impossible to influence your husband with the help of wedding candles, because actions with objects consecrated during the sacrament of the Wedding (candles, footstool, other objects) is a witchcraft practice, blasphemous and not acceptable for an Orthodox Christian.

Wedding candles are a family shrine. Pious custom involves careful storage of wedding candles as memories of the Sacrament of Marriage. Sometimes they are placed in the icon case, which they received as a blessing from their parents for marriage. Wedding candles can be lit briefly during times of separation or marital discord. You just need to remember that their kindling has power only under the condition of fervent prayer to God for your lost loved ones.

We must also remember that a person errs not always because of his malice or hardness of heart, but because of the loss of moral guidelines, which are based on the Gospel commandments. Then he can become an easy prey for evil people, a mockery for the devil.

The Divine Commandment says that only selfless love leads to happiness: “live in love, as Christ loved us... fornication and all uncleanness and covetousness should not even be mentioned among you... Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the Church and gave Himself for her "(Eph. 5.2, 3, 25). We just need to believe that there is a solid wall that protects us from everyday troubles and the eternal destruction of the soul, that the yoke of Christ’s commandments is good and easy.

One rather smart person recently told me: “I have a wife, a child, I love them very much, I take care of them, but I am lost. This is a pain that cannot be compared with physical pain. If I were a believer, how easy it would be for me to resolve this situation.”

It is customary to pray to the Holy Martyrs Gury, Samon and Aviv to protect the family from all misfortunes. They are known among Orthodox Christians as the patrons of marriage, marriage, and a happy family; they are prayed to “if a husband innocently hates his wife.”

And you, pious wives and children, save your souls with patience, because only “he who endures to the end will be saved” (Matthew 24:13).

Hieromonk Seraphim (Kalugin), Astrakhan. 03/18/2005

Use of materials is possible only with the written permission of the publisher.

Church divorce after a wedding: is it possible for married spouses to divorce?

The sacrament of wedding is a serious, responsible step, one of the church rites that unites spouses in life and after death. You should prepare for it spiritually and physically, because this is a step towards family life until death separates the spouses.

However, recently, some couples thoughtlessly decide to get married , without realizing the seriousness of this action. Such relationships are often short-lived. Unfortunately, marriages often break up.

Divorce statistics in Russia are very disappointing - more than half of registered relationships end in divorce.

How to get a divorce if the spouses were married?

In practice, debunking does not exist. The spouses are divorced in the registry office, according to the laws, and live separately. If one of the spouses wants to get married again, then he needs to submit a petition to the bishop for permission to remarry.

This procedure is called “debunking,” although in fact it is receiving a blessing for a subsequent marriage

Thus, the answer to the question is it possible to get married a second time after a divorce - yes, it is possible, with the permission of the church. You can get married up to three times . But the reasons for divorce, according to church statutes, must be significant. An excuse like “they don’t get along” will not work.

The Church has an extremely negative attitude towards any divorce, considering it a tragedy and a kind of death of the family. Especially if it's a wedding. But in any case, if family life turns out to be impossible for one or both spouses, then divorce is inevitable.

The consequences of such a difficult decision can be severe, but this is a matter of conscience for each spouse. The Church does not impose any contempt or punishment on divorced people - this is everyone’s personal matter , and they will answer to themselves and to God. An important question that people planning to divorce should ask themselves is whether it is possible to save the family or is it impossible.

How does church divorce happen?

Since there is no such thing as a church divorce after a wedding, there is only the concept of obtaining permission to remarry, this issue should be considered from the point of view of receiving a blessing.

Reasons for the Church to invalidate a marriage :

betrayal of one of the spouses;
change of religion of one of the spouses;
entering into another marriage;
abortion of a wife without the consent of her husband in the absence of medical indications for termination of pregnancy;
sexually transmitted diseases such as AIDS, syphilis and so on;
an attempt to encroach on the life of the other spouse;
disappearance of one spouse for more than 3 years;
inability to have children due to self-mutilation;
severe form of drug addiction, alcoholism;
if the spouse is sentenced to imprisonment for serious crimes.

The reason must be proven by relevant document or other evidence or certificate.

Spouses must be divorced at the registry office before obtaining permission

To apply, you need to contact the local Diocesan administration, where they will tell you how to make a request correctly and in whose name.

The petition must be accompanied by a divorce certificate and other documents confirming the reason for the divorce. If the bishop considers the grounds for divorce to be compelling, he will give permission for a second wedding.

However, if the spouse, through whose fault the divorce occurred - infidelity, entering into another marriage, and so on - wants to get married again, then he will most likely be denied such a petition, since he is guilty of the collapse of his previous family.

You need to understand that blessings for a wedding are not given just like that .

If you have any doubts about what is the best way to proceed, you can always consult your confessor or the same priest who performed the wedding ceremony. If this is not possible, you can go to a nearby temple and talk to the priest. Most likely, he will answer all questions and help with advice on what to do in the current difficult situation.

What to do with wedding candles after divorce?

The candles that the newlyweds hold in their hands during the wedding are called wedding candles. After the sacrament is completed, they are brought home and kept along with the icons with which the newlyweds were blessed for marriage.

Wedding candles are not a shrine, so no special rituals need to be performed

Candles can be burned during prayer or taken to church. It is not forbidden to leave them and store them in a box or next to the icons. You should not throw them away or give them to someone else. Although the signs and superstitions associated with candles are mostly fiction, it is worth finding a better use for them.

A towel (towel) can also be donated to the temple if it unpleasantly reminds you of a broken marriage.

Towel left after divorce

What to do with wedding icons after divorce?

Wedding icons are paired icons depicting the Most Holy Theotokos and Jesus Christ, which are used to bless spouses during the sacrament of wedding.

Icons can be donated to the temple, indicating that they are wedding icons. But icons do not depend in any way on when and under what circumstances they were acquired. Nothing prevents you from praying in front of them and lighting candles.

If wedding icons do not evoke any sad associations, then let them remain in the house, along with other icons, if any.

As for the wedding ring and dress, again, you can keep them or donate the ring to the temple , alter the dress or give it away, or maybe even throw it away. A dress, a ring - these are just things, memorable, but not possessing any mystical power. They do not in any way affect a person's life after a divorce.

You can donate a ring to the temple

Divorce is always a tragic event, even if it frees the spouses from an unhappy family life.

Before legalizing a second relationship, you need to weigh everything and seriously approach the issue of a second wedding .

Despite the fact that the church allows you to get married more than once, you should not use this permission lightly, especially if this is not the first wedding for the newlyweds.

What do you need for a wedding in a church?

Firstly, the readiness of the newlyweds. Organizing this sacred ceremony is possible only with the voluntary consent of the bride and groom .

The second condition is belonging to the Orthodox Church. It is impossible to marry the unbaptized, and it is pointless. If one of the newlyweds is of a different faith, then the wedding may be permitted provided that the children born in the marriage are baptized in the Orthodox Church.

The third condition is the presence of a marriage registration document . The Russian Orthodox Church does not allow people to get married before the wedding, fearing that one of the newlyweds may already be legally married? But after the wedding, even if you have been married for 15 years, you can get married at any time.

Organizing a celebration is a troublesome task, involving a lot of conventions. For example, it may be difficult to choose a date: weddings are prohibited on Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday, as well as during Lent. Therefore, if you are not married, but definitely decided to get married, you must first decide on the wedding date, and only then apply for marriage registration; and if you are already married, then choose the wedding day according to the church calendar.

Living spouses in a civil marriage without registration should know that if they want to get married, the priest will require documents confirming the official registration of the marriage at the registry office. No matter how long you live together, before the consecration of the union in the church, you must have your passports stamped.

Both newlyweds and married couples need to take into account some rules regarding appearance: chastity in clothes and makeup is harmoniously combined with the solemn church interior and a touching, spiritual ceremony. Pectoral crosses are required, and the bride's head must be covered.

The list of prohibitions on weddings is small:

Marriage between close relatives is not allowed.
The sacrament is allowed to be performed only three times. A fourth church marriage is prohibited.
A couple cannot be married if one of the newlyweds is married to another person.
Weddings with godparents are prohibited.
Weddings of persons over 80 years of age or with a large age difference are possible only with the permission of the bishop.

Church marriage between persons who are in a civil relationship is prohibited. For example, a father cannot marry his adopted daughter.