The tradition of wedding ransom in Rus'
This interesting custom has come down to us from ancient times. Slavic youths tried to choose a bride from another tribe. At first, we simply had to win back the girl . Later, the violent path was replaced by peaceful negotiations and exchange for valuable things, for example, furs, precious stones.
"Wedding ransom" by Konstantin Trutovsky (1881)
In Rus', ransom was a test for the future husband, a test of his ingenuity, dexterity and generosity. The ritual itself began from the moment the groom arrived at the bride’s house. The native girls created various obstacles: they could block the road with a huge log that needed to be sawed.
There were often fist fights that took place between relatives of the newlyweds. In addition to strength, the groom had to show intelligence and resourcefulness : he guessed riddles, sang, danced. All tests were designed to ensure that the betrothed revealed his positive qualities.
The groom always showed generosity : he treated the bride’s relatives and village children with sweets, and brought gifts to the girl herself.
Bride ransom in Russian folk style
Have you always been fascinated by the heroes of Russian fairy tales: blond beauties and brave heroes? So why don't you find yourself in their place at your own wedding. The Svadbaholik.ru portal presents to your attention a scenario of bride ransom in Russian folk style!
For such an original ransom you will need the following details:
- Russian dress for a witness,
- outfit for Leshy,
- children's tricycle,
- 2 tennis balls,
- 2 buckets,
- 2 plates,
- Balloons,
- toy sword.
The groom arrives with his friends at the bride’s house and is met by the witness:
Hello, good fellow! Alas, we have bad news: as soon as the red sun appeared on the horizon, your beautiful maiden was dragged into his lair by the snake Gorynych. Now she is languishing in captivity, but she hopes for your help. Are you ready, stalwart hero, to perform feats of arms in the name of great love? Do you agree to fight monsters, overcome mountains and seas to get to your betrothed?
The groom replies: “Ready!”
Then the witness says:
Just know, hero, the tests ahead of you will not be easy. They will demand from you enormous dexterity and heroic strength, since you will have to fight the serpent Gorynych! Aren't you afraid to speak out against him in order to free your beauty?
The groom says: “I won’t be afraid!”
And the witness continues:
Well, then take the military horse (he gives him a tricycle) and show if you can stay on this frisky horse!
The groom's task is to ride a children's bicycle a certain distance (for example, from the start to the entrance or around the house).
After the groom rode his bicycle, the witness says:
Well, I see your courage is great, you have passed the test, but the Russian hero must still be fast and dexterous in order to defeat the serpent Gorynych. In front of you are buckets of well water, next to them are two glass vessels containing balls. You are wearing a plate with which you will transfer water from the bucket to the vessel until the ball pops out. Yes, to fuel your spirit of competition, Leshy will compete with you.
The goblin can be played by one of the bride's friends, who is dressed up in rags. If Leshy completes the task faster than the groom, then he pays him a ransom.
When he completes the task, the witness says:
Well done, hero. But the next test awaits you: show us how you will fight the snake Gorynych. Hurry up, you don’t have much time, if you’re late, you won’t be able to see the red maiden like your ears. Take your sword and cut off the head of the snake Gorynych.
The groom says that he does not have a sword. To which the witness responds:
How come there are no weapons? What kind of hero are you?
The groom persuades the presenter, offering her to buy the weapon from her. He gives candy and champagne to the bridesmaids for the sword. Then the witness gives the toy sword to the groom and says:
Well, what can you do, I’ll have to help you out, good fellow. Here's your sword!
The groom takes a toy sword and tries to burst the balloons, pre-inflated and tied to the bride's door. As soon as he completes the task, the bride opens the door for him. And the ransom is coming to an end!
How is the ritual carried out nowadays?
There are quite a lot of options for ransom scenarios today. You can find them on the Internet or even create an individual script to order. However, certain points are repeated in each of them.
Let's look at how this usually happens:
- Meeting of the groom and his friends by the witness or bridesmaids.
- Explanation of the conditions of the “game”.
- Carrying out tasks by the groom.
- Payback in case of incorrect completion of a task.
- Upon completion of all tasks, permission to meet the bride.
- Small buffet.
Usually the ransom is organized by girlfriends or close relatives of the young woman . They prepare competitions, riddles, and all the paraphernalia necessary for them in advance. Everyone can participate in the action itself: the groom and his retinue are the most active participants, the rest are assistants or spectators .
Participant Roles
- The groom completes tasks, treats his girlfriends with sweets or champagne, and pays off if he cannot answer a question correctly.
- Friends (brothers) from the groom’s side help in competitions, provide refreshments, and help the groom with money if a payoff is needed.
- Girlfriends, witnesses, sisters draw up a script and conduct all the competitions; they do not allow the groom to see his beloved until he completes all the tasks.
- The bride helps her bridesmaids when drawing up questions, for example, about some dates, sizes, etc. On the wedding day, the groom is expected in a secret place.
- The bride's parents can hold the latest competitions on the way to the bride, and then hand over their daughter into the hands of the future husband. They also organize a buffet and welcome guests.
- Matchmakers (parents of the groom) can also offer their help either to their son in completing tasks or in preparing food for everyone.
Slavic bride ransom ritual
From the very morning, one of the important rituals awaits all guests, namely the bride price, traditions. Since a man is the head of the house, he must prove that he is able to win a woman’s heart. For this, a ransom ritual is used.
The groom and his groomsmen went to the bride's house. A large number of onlookers were already gathering near the house. These were not only relatives, but also neighbors. Children came in large numbers and needed to be treated to sweets.
The groom and his friends had to have treats and money ready. Initially, the bride price ritual was organized by the bride's in-laws and parents. Then the girl’s friends took over this tradition. Currently, it is the girlfriends who organize and host the celebration.
The girls came up with and developed a whole scenario, which the young man had to follow. He had to complete many tasks in order to reach his beloved. At that time, the man had a positive attitude towards the tasks, because he understood that they were necessary in order to ensure a happy family life.
Most of the tasks were based on ingenuity. The young man also needed to show his own strength. The groom's friends could help with the tasks.
If a man performed all the instructions poorly, then in the end he was given a completely different girl, and perhaps even an old woman. This was done for fun. At the end, of course, a beautiful bride was brought out. Currently, a similar scenario has been preserved, but more and more often they dress a man as a young lady. This cannot but cause applause and genuine laughter.
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On the evening before the ransom, the bride and her friends had to cook porridge. How much she annoyed her indicated that the marriage was based on love, and not on calculation. The future husband and his friends were presented with porridge in order to convince them of the girl’s feelings.
Where to spend it?
Traditionally, the ceremony was held in the bride's house. Now many continue to follow this custom, meeting the groom on the threshold of the newlywed's house. However, this is not the only place where a ransom can be arranged.
When deciding on the location of the event, do not forget about its festive decor. You can use ribbons, balloons, fresh or artificial flowers, photographs of the newlyweds.
Where can you conduct a ransom other than at home?
- In the fresh air . The picturesque corner of the park will allow you to organize the action itself in an interesting way and take beautiful photographs. The bride can be hidden in a cute gazebo.
- On the territory of a country house . The house does not have to belong to the bride; you can simply rent it or ask friends to provide a house for a while.
- In a spacious hotel room . Often, young people book a room for a photo shoot, including for getting ready for the bride before the wedding. The ransom can also be carried out there. You just need to check with the administration whether they will be against such an event.
- In the mall . Original girlfriends can make a ransom in the form of a quest for the groom, forcing him to walk through different departments in search of his betrothed.
Important! When choosing a place for a ransom, consider its location. It should be as close as possible to the bride's gathering place.
How to prepare for the groom?
To prevent the ransom from turning into a real torment for the groom, he needs to think through some points in advance .
- Check with your girlfriends whether you will need any specific items for the sale.
- Stock up on sweets, chocolate, champagne, fruit.
- Carry cash with you. It can be bills, coins, antique or even fake money.
- Prepare informatively: remember important dates together, names of relatives, clothing sizes, lover’s shoes, etc.
- You can prepare tips with affectionate names and characteristics of your beloved.
- Find out the exact time when he should arrive for ransom and its approximate duration.
- Bring with you creative and resourceful friends who will not get confused in any competition.
Tips for organizers
The success of the event will largely depend on the preparation, and therefore on the bridesmaids organizing the ransom. What is important for them to take into account when deciding on the action scenario?
- The venue should be considered taking into account the aesthetic properties of the room. An old entrance with numerous inscriptions on the walls will not be the best option. An alternative could be ransom on the street.
- There is no need to stretch out the ransom over time. 20-30 minutes will be more than enough.
- Options for scenarios can be found on the Internet, but it will be more interesting to adapt them to suit your couple.
- There is no need to get sophisticated in competitions and torment the groom. It is not advisable to offer tasks related to serious physical activity, drinking alcohol, or trying low-edible foods.
- The ransom should not turn into an outright money grab.
- The personal qualities of the groom should also be taken into account. A shy person should not be offered tasks of an ambiguous nature.
- It is necessary to think over alternative options for competitions and be prepared for unforeseen circumstances.
What to replace the ransom with?
Bride price is a tradition that many couples adhere to. However, it is not strictly mandatory. The newlyweds have the right to decide for themselves whether they need this action. Time flies very quickly on your wedding day. If you are not adherents of ancient customs, then it is better to spend precious minutes on a beautiful photo shoot together.
There are also interesting modern alternatives . What can replace the classic buyout?
- In an original way, the “reverse ransom” (or “groom’s ransom”) takes place, when the bride is asked to overcome certain obstacles in order to get to her lover.
- "Parallel" buyback . The bride and groom perform tasks simultaneously, demonstrating their best qualities and proving that they are worthy of each other.
- Quest for the groom . This option will require more time both for preparation and implementation. It is associated with the movement of the groom and his retinue around the city, district, shopping center, searching for clues and completing tasks.
- Romantic meeting in nature. Young people can agree in advance to meet in a certain place, for example, on a park bench. For such a meeting, we recommend inviting a photographer and/or videographer to capture the event.
- Meeting through the window . Particularly impatient and brave grooms can try to bypass obstacles in this way and get straight to their beloved. You shouldn't show excessive heroism if the bride lives on a high floor!
Traditional Slavic bride ransom script
The ransom script came to us many centuries later. Therefore, today almost all newlyweds try to observe the traditions of their ancestors. Therefore, every wedding on the first day begins with a bride price. According to tradition, the newlyweds should not see each other before the wedding, but the young husband can convey news to his beloved in the form of gifts. This is done through the bride’s relatives, thereby our ancestors showed that the husband would pamper his wife. After all, soon he will take her and become her patron. But the gifts were made simple and unpretentious.
Obstacles to the groom at the bride ransom ceremony
The morning of the wedding day began with the ransom itself. The bridegroom's relatives made many obstacles to the groom. They were designed to test his ingenuity. The girl's friends played the role of sellers in the market, where the bride was considered a commodity. Many modern sayings come from those times. The groom, who passed all the tests, went to the bride. But along the way he had to treat the bride’s relatives and friends. If the groom passed the test poorly, then they could slip him another girl. This tradition still exists today, but for fun I also dress men in dresses. During the tests, girls and children were given sweets and small gifts, and men were given alcohol.
The bride's parents were also preparing for the wedding. The newlyweds wore a simple outfit. A simple white scarf was worn on the head. In ancient times, white symbolized death. Therefore, the bride's face was completely covered. A covered face is necessary so that people do not see the face of the crying bride. The girl’s tears symbolized her grief for her home and patron spirits. The scarf also covered the bride’s braid; it was believed that she contained supernatural powers. If we raise the issue of spirits, then our ancestors believed that the power stored in the bride’s braid could offend the spirits that patronize the groom’s family. Therefore, the braid was unraveled or cut off, and the groom carried the bride into the house in his arms, as if showing the spirits that now she also belonged to their family.
On the eve of the ransom, the girl was preparing salty porridge. A large amount of salt indicated that the marriage was not of convenience. This porridge was given to the groom's retinue to try during the ransom.
In some tribes the ransom was carried out differently. The first to enter the bride's house were the matchmakers, who negotiated with the parents, while the groom and his best friend stood behind them. The girl's parents previously hid their goods on the street. And when the negotiations ended, the groom, who had already found the bride in the yard, went into the house with her. Next, the parents asked their daughter’s consent to the marriage.
Is it necessary to have a buffet?
Traditionally, after the lovers have united, guests are offered a small treat. You shouldn’t have a feast, but light snacks in the form of sandwiches, canapés, fruit, wine and champagne will be very appropriate.
The groom and his friends and the rest of the ransom participants may get hungry, so you should not neglect organizing a buffet table. In addition, for everyone it will be a little respite before an important event.
Of course, if you choose an alternative redemption option, for example, a meeting in the park or a quest, then the buffet can be omitted.
Obstacles to the groom at the bride ransom ceremony
The groom and his friends need to participate so actively in the events that everyone around them is confident in the bright feelings of the young spouse. But even if they are confident in this, the bride’s friends will in any case insist on the trials that they will have to go through.
Initially, they ask the groom's matchmakers to tell him how good he is. The witness must prepare a short and succinct speech in advance. He will have to name as many positive characteristics of the young man as possible.
https://youtu.be/c9lqN6_hTJQ
But the bride's friends cannot just listen to flattering words about the groom. They may ask you to name all his characteristics that begin with the letter "e". This will be much funnier and more interesting. In this case, it can be established that there should be at least 10 words.
An obligatory part of the ransom is to check the young man's knowledge of the bride. He may be asked to guess the eyes, lips, weight, silhouette of the bride. In this test, it is very important not to make mistakes and guess absolutely all the important points.
One of the popular tasks involves guessing and matching dates and events. In this case, it is worth including not only the bride’s birthday, but also the mother-in-law, future father-in-law, date and day of acquaintance. As a comic test, you can write the day of a solar eclipse. On the one hand, it will be quite funny, but on the other hand, you will slightly confuse the groom.
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Examples from weddings (photos)
Below in the photographs you will see how buybacks usually take place (both traditional and unusual options):
Ransom in quest format (video)
The bride's friends prepared a very unusual test for the groom. Quest in the summer, this is an excellent alternative to ransoming at the entrance or house (wedding of Mukhamet and Leysan, Ufa):
Whether to follow ancient traditions or not is up to each couple to decide for themselves. If you like Russian customs, then you need to carefully prepare for the ransom. All participants in the action should know their roles and the approximate scenario, then the event will be fun and interesting.
Supporters of modern trends can turn to alternative options, because creating your own traditions is no less exciting.
Original scripts for bride ransom at a wedding
Bride ransom is a fun but serious tradition. It has deep meaning for newlyweds. Conducting a good, interesting buyout means setting the stage for a life together. And the ceremony also helps wedding participants easily and naturally join the ceremonial part.
The bride's ransom scenario in a private house differs from the bride's ransom in a modern-style apartment, which reduces the distance to the bride. But this condition does not in any way affect the number and intensity of competition tasks.
The bride and groom at the ransom during the competition
The finished bride ransom scenario looks something like this:
- Entrance examination. Most often, an organizational script for a wedding is created for the witness or sister of the bride. The appointed person meets the groom at the door. There are traces of women's feet painted on the steps of the stairs. The lover's task will be to guess the contour of his betrothed. For each incorrect answer you have to pay a penalty in money or candy.
- Second round. The daring groom finds himself in the entrance or hallway of his chosen one and here another puzzle awaits him. On the walls there is a gallery of photographs of lovely girls of toddler and preschool age. Which one is the bride? The heart of a man in love knows the exact answer.
- The third catch. The organizer of the competition gives a creative task for generosity. The groom is instructed to lay out a money mosaic in the form of the bride's name. The funds collected from the floor go into the family treasury.
- Wet place. Having successfully moved up the ladder, the man will be discouraged by a very funny ransom scenario. A basin filled to the brim with water is placed in front of him. We need to wash our most valuable gift. Guests give hints and hints at the correct answer. The groom checks his pockets and discovers that he himself is worth his weight in gold. In a moment of inspiration, he takes off his shoes and stands in the water. The organizers keep a dry towel at the ready.
- Before the finish line. At the final stage, the groom faces a severe test. The groom must write 15 reasons why he is marrying his bride. The first reason is love, but the man comes up with the remaining 14 facts himself. After the successful outcome of the competition, the presenter asks for a symbolic ransom of a bottle of champagne and a box of chocolates. The end of the ransom takes place to the sound of applause and congratulations - the winner enters the chosen one’s room.
the trials with valor , the groom feels like a real hero, and the bride feels like a queen, for whose sake feats are performed. This is the best wedding ransom scenario because it proves the seriousness of the groom’s intentions.
Scenarios for themed weddings are becoming increasingly popular Non-standard buyout options may be as follows.
Police-themed bride price
You can make an interesting, cool ransom for a wedding using a traffic police-style ransom.
The bridesmaids dress in police uniforms, the obligatory attribute of which is a black and white striped baton.
It is permissible for men on the spouse's side to dress in a caricature: combining torn sneakers or jeans with the serious look of a patrol officer. For better improvisation, traffic police officers come up with a comic ID card: “Family Justice Inspector. Senior detective for marriage registration Kuzma Ilyich Mendelson.”
The scenario is divided into 3 main stages:
- The checkpoint service in front of the bride's house slows down the groom's motorcade. The inspector holds evidence of the groom's speeding; crazy numbers are shown on the drawn radar. A policeman asks a troublemaker for his right to family happiness. If the groom does not have any, he will be forced to take out a lifetime loan to bribe the traffic police officer. But there is an option to earn rights in an honest way.
- An examination of the offender’s condition will show whether the citizen who exceeded the speed limit is in his right mind. The next stage begins and the bride price continues in medical style. Doctors conduct a tricky sobriety test on the groom. A man needs to manage to follow the footprints pasted on trees and walls. In this matter, the groom is helped by friends who carry him in their arms. Having passed a difficult route, the future husband is tested for coordination and vision. The first test a man sees is a poster with possible affectionate nicknames for his beloved, which are written together in one word: “my dear gold, sweet darling, sunshine, berries, pussy wife.” The subject must read it quickly. Got your tongue stuck? This means the reader is drunk and pays a fine to the nurse.
Groom at the ransom in the style of the traffic police
The next test is a vision test. There is a homemade dart board pasted on the wall. The target sectors contain indications of the reasons why a man gets married:
- the washing machine broke down;
- I'm afraid of my son-in-law;
- I love borscht;
- argued with friends;
- I want a baby;
- for love.
Only by throwing a dart does the groom himself understand the depth and truth of his intentions.
- The final stage is exams at the traffic police academy . To complete it, the groom guesses what the signs on the road of love mean:
- image of a tap - for washing dishes;
- crossed out horn - do not shout;
- image of an airplane - vacation in the Maldives;
- bed drawing - fulfill marital duty;
- the image of a campsite promises the construction of a house.
If the lover answered the task correctly or paid off, they begin to torture him with the last task to test his memory.
The commission expects from him the correct answers to tricky questions :
- When is mother-in-law's birthday?
- What day was your first date with your bride?
- What are your father-in-law's hobbies?
- What year did the bride go to school?
- How many children are you planning?
When the exams are successfully passed, the inspector congratulates the groom. The satisfied winner receives the rights of family happiness and the most beloved woman in the world.
Quest - a new direction of entertainment
The idea of ransoming a bride in the style of a quest is also an excellent program for a beautiful ransom for a city bride. To organize a quest-style bride ransom, you need a map of the area. It is not necessary to buy it in a store, just draw a schematic drawing on a landscape sheet.
Prepare an album for the bride price
The directions in the map will reveal the following stages to the groom:
- A starting point is drawn on the map where the first clue is hidden. In this place they hide a phone number, by calling which the groom will receive another hint.
- A telephone conversation directs a searching lover to a city square, where a note with a rebus about the whereabouts of the bride is hidden under a bench. Having solved it, the groom learns another clue.
- After going through a series of kilometers and trials in search of the bride, the groom will be surprised to find the bride in the neighbors’ apartment.
An exciting and non-standard buyout program can last for half a day and will tire the restless groom even before the registry office. The bride will also get bored in the long wait for her beloved, but the end of the ransom will give them the value of every minute spent next to her beloved.
Magic bride price scenario
The fairy-tale romantic scenario of the bride's ransom is accompanied by heroes of folk legends and cartoons . An interesting option is bride ransom with Baba Yaga.
The main characters are the Serpent Gorynych, Baba Yaga, Koschey the Immortal and the gypsies, who are the organizers of the bride theft scenario at a wedding.
- Distraught with grief, the groom rushes in pursuit of the gypsies , but his path is blocked by the Serpent Gorynych. He asks the groom to find on the tablet among 3 dozen eggs the one in which the death of Koshchei the Immortal is buried. A man can pay off with money or go to Baba Yaga for advice.
- Baba Yaga forces the groom to assemble an air stomp from a barrel . Only Koschey the Immortal knows the secret of the jet engine.
- Koschey has not eaten for 1000 years and is very hungry. He agrees to work for food. The immortal asks the groom to bring him 30 eggs or give him money for bread. The savvy groom brings him those in which Koshchei’s death is hidden.
- Grateful Gorynych helps to beautifully complete the ransom to save the bride from the gypsies.
A similar scenario can be seen in the video of a cool, fun wedding bride price:
The idea of buying a bride through a marriage agency
An original and unusual scenario for bride ransom would be bride ransom in the style of a marriage agency. On the street, the groom is met by his bridesmaids and offered him several catalogs with ladies of his heart. The groom must buy one of them and choose the bride. The catalog with the real beloved turns out to be the latest and most expensive.
The idea of bride price in a judicial theme
An excellent version would be a court-style bride price scenario. Dressed in court robes, the bridesmaids accuse the groom of trying to kidnap a girl from her parents' house. The groom's friends act as lawyers and prove the good intentions of the ward. The groom's humorous vows of innocence will greatly speed up the process.
Military themed wedding price idea
The military style bride ransom is similar to the traffic police style ransom. Only the form of the participants will differ. The groom is a new recruit in the family and needs to undergo a medical examination. After that, he proves his combat suitability by clearly hitting the target and answering questions correctly.
A video of how a bride ransom takes place at a military-style wedding can be seen below:
Wedding price idea in Ford Boyard style
The scenario is based on the rules of the game. The groom will need to collect a bunch of 7 ancient keys , and to do this, pass 7 tests that the old sage Fura prepared for him:
Guests will appreciate the valor of the winner, who easily overcame all the difficulties of the test. The bride will rightfully be proud of such a chosen one.
The idea of a wedding price through travel
A man in love comes to pick up his chosen one, but her girlfriends report shocking news: the bride has flown off on a trip .
The groom has to guess the country where the chosen one went
To guess, he needs to visit several countries and collect pieces of his beloved’s route!
Guests of the celebration will be able to appreciate the efforts of the groom . A travel-style bride price will prepare the newlyweds for their honeymoon and post-wedding voyage.